If you cant let go....let go!

[mightywindr]

Why can I sometimes let go and sometimes not be able to?

Do we DEFINITELY have an innate ability to let go?

Or is that just hogwash, and sometimes we can let go sometimes we cannot?

It seems like we do have some kind of innate ability to just let go, but that doesn't explain why I cant always just let go, (or I cant seem to) and in a practical way I literally cant let go.

I know if you believe a technique will work it is more likely to work, so please dont tell me a lie in order to help me get it to work, I hate that, I feel like its short term gain long term pain because if you realise later on that it was only working because of a lie it usually stops working.

So please tell me objectively if we can ALWAYS just "let go" or if sometimes we can sometimes we cant?

[JonW]

You can go round and round with these questions.
Again, this is all about practice. You won't think your way to letting go. Every meditation is about allowing things to be just as they are. No grasping. No resisting. And no striving to attain a particular state.
So tell us about your practice.

[mightywindr]

You can go round and round with these questions.
Again, this is all about practice. You won't think your way to letting go. Every meditation is about allowing things to be just as they are. No grasping. No resisting. And no striving to attain a particular state.
So tell us about your practice.

Can you help me with this one thought, Im doing a practice too, it will really help because the desire to know is strong once I know I can drop it and get on but if I dont drop it the desire to know will remain and become over bearing, even though this is not the usually thing we should do can you please make an exception this is kinda important to me (im not just trying to become happy I enjoy understanding subjects like these too) it may be more practical in this case to just think this one thought rather than skip it

I also find understanding helps you learn too, even though its the opposite of what we should be doing understanding helps you do (or not do) in the right way.

Kind regards bro

[JonW]

Well, what is it that you have difficulty letting go of?

[mightywindr]

Well, what is it that you have difficulty letting go of?

Im trying to understand the core dynamic, not any one particular thing, when we really want to let go and it appears we cant because we are trying to and its not working, can we in-fact still let go, or is that not correct?


(is it always possible to let go, or is it a case that sometimes its not possible to let go?)

[JonW]

'Is it always possible to let go, or is it a case that sometimes its not possible to let go?'

That depends on the individual. doesn't it?
This is basic to mindfulness meditation. We choose an anchor - the breath, sound, body sensations, whatever. We place our attention on the chosen anchor. From time to time, we notice that we are lost in thought or distracted in some other way, and we choose to bring our attention back to our anchor.
That is how we learn to let go. We notice where our attention has gone and we bring it back.
That is the practice.
With practice, it tends to become second nature to notice that we are caught up in rumination on the past or worries about the future, and to being ourselves back to the present moment. That is letting go.
It just takes practice. It's not a riddle to be solved. There's not really any thinking involved. Just noticing and coming back, noticing and coming back, again and again and again if necessary.

[mightywindr]

'Is it always possible to let go, or is it a case that sometimes its not possible to let go?'

That depends on the individual. doesn't it?
This is basic to mindfulness meditation. We choose an anchor - the breath, sound, body sensations, whatever. We place our attention on the chosen anchor. From time to time, we notice that we are lost in thought or distracted in some other way, and we choose to bring our attention back to our anchor.
That is how we learn to let go. We notice where our attention has gone and we bring it back.
That is the practice.
With practice, it tends to become second nature to notice that we are caught up in rumination on the past or worries about the future, and to being ourselves back to the present moment. That is letting go.
It just takes practice. It's not a riddle to be solved. There's not really any thinking involved. Just noticing and coming back, noticing and coming back, again and again and again if necessary.

Thanks brother ))

So basically not always.

The idea "if you cant let go...let go" is a saying a cue, and it implies you can let go even when you think you cant, but that is probably a LIE, its a lie that ASSISTS you being able to let go. So a positive lie. But its not accurate.

Thats brilliant thanks mate!!

I hate these "positive lies" that the mindfulness community uses, its very damaging because when you find out its just a lie to help you the technique or saying you loved so much stops working, and you wasted time, its better to only teach whats real because then its a solid foundation that works and doesn't fall apart later on

[JonW]

No, there's no lying involved. Nothing could be more straightforward.

[mightywindr]

No, there's no lying involved. Nothing could be more straightforward.

What I mean is there are alot of sayings that are designed to help you that are not accurate but made in a way that assists you via lies. So if I tell you , that you can let go when you think you cant, then if you dont realise I have lied and you take that as fact, you will be better able to let go . BUT then if you find out later on that it was just a lie the technique will no longer work.

Its irrational psychology ie it still works but only on people that dont realise

[mightywindr]

Dont worry about me getting this down I feel very tranquil my mind is quiet without me even trying because ive been doing alot for a while now and ive built up an automatic all day quieter mind, im really hammering this hard , ie working very hard on it, the proper way, I just like to understand subjects properly its something else I enjoy doing and another hobby unrelated , im a nerd