How many of you live in the moment?

[JohnReset]

This is kind of survey. The question is simple: do you live in the moment most of the day?

We know that practice is fundamental to live in the moment. As JonW said (I don't remember in which topic): mindfulness exercises are our practice, everyday mindfulness is our meditation. I like this sentence.

So, I want to know how many of you (expert practictioneers) are able to live fully the life and are able to live in the moment. I'm not able yet. But I will be.

Thanks for your time.

[JonW]

Hi John,
I wouldn't believe someone who claimed to be mindful every waking moment of their day. It's simply not possible.
The aim here is not about striving to be mindful. The process should be a lot more gentle and self-compassionate than that.
We can be deliberately mindful - say when we meditate in a certain way or we approach an everyday activity like brushing our teeth in a mindful way.
Or we can catch ourselves not being mindful - when we're lost in thought - ruminating on the past, speculating about the future. And so we become attentive to our inattentiveness and bring ourselves back to the present.
So there's no fully living in the moment 24/7. There's either being mindful in this moment or not being mindful.
No-one gets to be an expert at this. It doesn't work that way.
Just keep practicing.
Cheers,
Jon

[Peter]

I don't want to offend you, but it feels like you keep setting goals and creating expectations for yourself. Just enjoy how it is for you right now!

Peter

[JohnReset]

I don't want to offend you, but it feels like you keep setting goals and creating expectations for yourself. Just enjoy how it is for you right now!

Peter

Thanks for your reply, Peter.

I'm not offended. The problem is not about setting goals, the problem is about not being able to even enjoy a simple meal because your mind wanders or thinks about something else. Or not being able to enjoy a walk, the odours, the colors, the sensations. These are not goals, these are life, the moment. I didn't start mindfulness practice to overcome anxiety or something else, I started it because I want to reconnect with my self, my senses.

I don't want other goals to put effort in, I already have them in my life. I just want to live.

And I think this forum is like water in the desert. I want to know if any of you have or had this issues (not being able to enjoy the senses) and if mindfulness practice helped you.

That's all. I hope I have been clearer with this reply.

Edit: At this page (of this site): http://www.everyday-mindfulness.org/why-everyday/

They say:
"As time progresses, mindfulness becomes easier and easier to develop and being in the present moment becomes as much of a habit as our normal state of distractedness."

Then... why can't it be possible to be in the moment most time of the day?

[Matt Y]

Being mindful all day would be like being awake all day. You could try that, but sleep will win in the end, and you'll probably get very grumpy, tired and sick in the process.

Mindfulness is one of many helpful states of mind. Dreaming, reverie, reflection, planning, worry, distraction are other useful states of mind. Many of the things we do don't need our full attention so our brains automate these processes. That's a good thing.

Most of us probably spend about 90% of our time in our heads and 10% in 'our senses'. We don't need to aim to reverse this ratio. Even a 50/50 ratio is probably an unrealistic goal. However, we can aim to be 10% more mindful, or engaged with our sensory experience, and that would be enough.

A meditator who aims for perfection is bound to disappointment. Be a mediocre meditator, and you'll be much happier!

[JonW]

'As time progresses, mindfulness becomes easier and easier to develop and being in the present moment becomes as much of a habit as our normal state of distractedness.'

This can be true but, again, it takes time, patience and a lot of self-compassion. If you're in a hurry to get to that point, it becomes self-defeating.
The changes are subtle and tend to be discerned over months rather than days. My advice would be to let go of what you want mindfulness to do for you right now, and check back on that in six months. Meanwhile, keep at your practice and keep it fresh.
It's worth remembering that we can be mindful about mindfulness. As soon as we start projecting into the future, anticipating how things are going to be a few weeks/months/years down the line, we're back in the same old trap of living our lives in our heads, a long way from the present moment. "How mindful will I be if I continue to meditate" is just another thought.
Just abide and let it be. Or, as Pema Chodron says, "Meditation is not about getting out of ourselves or achieving something better. It’s about getting in touch with what you already are." Never a truer word...
We're here to help and support. So stick around.
You're doing great.
Cheers,
Jon

[Gareth]

Excellent answers from the others. I can only agree with what they have said.

Our brains are thought machines; constantly churning them out during all our waking hours. This is not going to change. What might change, given enough time and practice is the way that you deal with these thoughts. And just this small difference is enough to make positive changes to our life.

It's difficult, I know, but try and let go of your goals for know, and just keep meditating consistently. The benefits of mindfulness come slowly, and they creep up on you almost invisibly. Stick around and keep talking to us to - it will help you on your journey.

[Mischa]

For me, it is much easier to be mindfull when I am with others then when I am alone. When I am with others, I truly listen to them and I hear them. My mind doesn't wonder of thinking about the dishes and stuff. But when I do the dishes, I think about the laundry and that I have to pay a bill...
So for me as well, it is a constant reminder to come back to this moment. And the daily excersise helps me with that.

[MiM]

... the problem is about not being able to even enjoy a simple meal because your mind wanders or thinks about something else. Or not being able to enjoy a walk, the odours, the colors, the sensations. These are not goals, these are life, the moment. I didn't start mindfulness practice to overcome anxiety or something else, I started it because I want to reconnect with my self, my senses.
...
I want to know if any of you have or had this issues (not being able to enjoy the senses) and if mindfulness practice helped you.

I cannot say if I am talking about the same thing as you, but I have also, for a very long time now felt a sort of disconnection. Not only with my senses, but even with life itself. And in the core of that disconnection lies a lack of feeling enjoyment and happiness. However, that was never the reason for me to start mindfulness (at least not consciously).

Has mindfulness helped me in that respect? Yes and no. It is much easier for me to stay focused in the now today, but staying focused does not automatically bring me more joy. On the other hand, I am more accepting and content with how things are now. I am not often displeased, neither am I suffering from anything like depression. This is just how my emotional life is right now. Maybe it will change in the future, maybe it will not. I would not mind if it did, though

[JohnReset]

... the problem is about not being able to even enjoy a simple meal because your mind wanders or thinks about something else. Or not being able to enjoy a walk, the odours, the colors, the sensations. These are not goals, these are life, the moment. I didn't start mindfulness practice to overcome anxiety or something else, I started it because I want to reconnect with my self, my senses.
...
I want to know if any of you have or had this issues (not being able to enjoy the senses) and if mindfulness practice helped you.

I cannot say if I am talking about the same thing as you, but I have also, for a very long time now felt a sort of disconnection. Not only with my senses, but even with life itself. And in the core of that disconnection lies a lack of feeling enjoyment and happiness. However, that was never the reason for me to start mindfulness (at least not consciously).

Has mindfulness helped me in that respect? Yes and no. It is much easier for me to stay focused in the now today, but staying focused does not automatically bring me more joy. On the other hand, I am more accepting and content with how things are now. I am not often displeased, neither am I suffering from anything like depression. This is just how my emotional life is right now. Maybe it will change in the future, maybe it will not. I would not mind if it did, though

I feel disconnection with my senses too. But, maybe, something is happening, something is changing. As my signature says: "Believe nothing, test everything", so I keep doing mindfulness practice (I found this video very helpful: viewtopic.php?f=3&t=4451).

MiM, only you can understand me, we share the same problem (disconnection with senses), so we'll keep in touch.

Edit: MiM, how long are you practising mindfulness?