Acceptance

[Steve]

Acceptance is something that many find hard in mindfulness, I certainly do. I've just read the following passage by Tara Barch and it helps me so thought I would share it.

"Sometimes, however, just the notion of allowing brings up vehement resistance. “What do you mean!” someone might say. “Am I supposed to accept that he betrayed me? “Am I supposed to say ‘yes’ to feeling self-loathing?” “To this awful anxiety?” In these situations it is important to point out that we are agreeing only the experience—in our body, heart, mind—in the present moment. We’re not being asked to accept the situation itself or another person’s behavior, just the felt experience, here and now. In fact, when resistance arises, or first step is to accept the experience of resisting. We are recognizing and allowing the disgust, the tension in the body, the
blaming thoughts, the aversion. As I often teach it, “You are saying ‘yes’ to your ‘no!’

The words that really help me are:

"We’re not being asked to accept the situation itself or another person’s behavior, just the felt experience, here and now."

Steve

[Steve]

correction: Tara Brach

[Gareth]

Yes, this concept is quite alien for some people, but my experience is that radical acceptance brings with it an overwhelming amount of peace. I think this one is an Eckhart Tolle quote:

What could be more futile than resisting what already is?

[scratchet]

thanks steve, that has really helped me.

[JonW]

"We’re not being asked to accept the situation itself or another person’s behavior, just the felt experience, here and now."
Beautifully explained. Thanks Steve.

[FeeHutch]

I've tried to explain how acceptance and mindfulness helps me deal with chronic pain in a hospital group today but I'm not sure I did such a good job as this does.