What are your evening rituals for ending the day?

[Metaphysical Me]

I was wondering if any of you have good / helpful mindfulness rituals for ending your day?

I've never been much good at ending the day. I usually start thinking about everything that happened during the day, which has me staying awake too long, which makes it unnecessarily hard to get up in the mornings.

Do you do a "night cap" meditation? Go outside and look at the night sky? Write a journal entry about your day?

I'd love to hear suggestions for mindfully ending a mindful day.

(Oh and I think I get a bit "theatrical" about ending the day sometimes... Too much pathos about the day "drawing to a close", the day "being over", sleep being "the half-brother of death", that this day will never return, yada yada yada... A bit melodramatic... you get the picture... So something a little more light-hearted would be great... Something along the lines of "just gonna take an 8 hour nap before continuing where I leave off now"...)

[FeeHutch]

I think of one thing I'm thankful for from the day no matter what my mood is, I check on my children and kiss my husband

[Metaphysical Me]

Hi Fee, that's a lovely ritual.

I was thinking of doing something similar - finding something to be thankful for from the day and applying Rick Hanson's "take in the good" method to it.

It's basically about really, really allowing your brain and subconscious to feel the good thing you are thankful for. (It's to do with the scientific discovery that our brains have a "negativity bias" (which has to do with the fact that a negativity bias has evolutionary survival benefits...) Hanson explains this as "Unfortunately, our brains are like velcro for negative stuff and like teflon for positive stuff".)

So I was thinking I could do that. And maybe do the raisin meditation? It would be nice to end the day on a "sweet" note, and with something neutral.

(I think if I start focusing on inner experiences like my breath, etc, at the end of the day, I might start thinking too much about myself and my day again... I'm so prone to runaway thinking at night, when I'm tired and getting sleepy... so a raisin meditation sounds like it might be perfect for me.)

[piedwagtail91]

my last day on broadband for a couple of weeks so making the most of it.

i think i take the opposite approach.
it's something i put together over several months and has proved invaluable when things aren't so good.
it doesn't guarantee that i get off to sleep straight away, i don't think anything does but more often than not i'm asleep pretty quickly.

i combine some pranayama from my yoga teacher, either nadi shodana or soham- yoga breathing to start, this is pretty calming no matter what's gone on during the day.
then if it's been a problem free day it's a mindfulness choiceless awareness or sitting practice followed by trataka,-a sort of candle gazing to put it in simple terms, though if it's a full moon i try to use that.
if it's been a bit of a difficult day then the choiceless awareness or sitting practice is swapped for working with difficulty.
if it's been a very difficult day i switch to self-compassion and practice a soften, soothe and allow for as long as it takes.
total time is usually around thirty minutes, but that's very flexible.

i don't like to try to sleep with problems as i've found that for me over time it's best to experience things at the end of the day and let them go.
i quite like this quote which was attached to a post by the dalai lama
if it can be solved, there's no need to worry, and if it can't be solved ,worry is of no use.
so i try to meditate and experience the days difficulties that are still there at the end of every day and if they do come back the following day then they've usually lost their sting.

a couple of people have tried this routine , one didn't get on with it at all and one changed it slightly and like me gets off to sleep pretty quickly.
we've both found that staying asleep is another matter!

[Metaphysical Me]

Wow, Mick, thank you so much! What a brilliant post.

I love the stuff you've suggested. I've heard of most of the elements you're using, but not all, so I will google those.

I think it sounds like a brilliant combination and I will definitely try some of it the coming days.

I have had trouble with insomnia for many years but have found some great help for it over the past 12 months. I'll post some pointers later on, because I'm about to have dinner now, so no time just now!

How come you'll be without broadband?

I especially love the quote you've mentioned from the Dalai Lama. That's a beautiful sentiment for closing off a day!

if it can be solved, there's no need to worry, and if it can't be solved ,worry is of no use.

XXX Janey

[piedwagtail91]

we're away and have no signal so it's the down to the phone which won't be big enough to type on.

[Metaphysical Me]

we're away and have no signal so it's the down to the phone which won't be big enough to type on.

Have a nice trip!

[piedwagtail91]

Thanks

[ONE: Deeper Peace]

Great question! I end my days in quiet, simple sanctuary. I love that I've been doing this for so long so that it is not something I have to consciously choose anymore; it's an intrinsic and natural part of my life's practice.

Bedroom is my space for this, so it is set up as such. No clutter. Simple, comfortable furniture. Whatever books I am reading. A glass of water. Candles. Most importantly: no electronic devices nor stimulation. (computers, phones/tablets, tv, etc.) The only electric item of mine is my reading lamp. (My partner needs an alarm so there is one on his side of the bed.)

When it is time to end the day, it is important that I have a gradual transformation from the activity of everyday life into my sanctuary. Whatever rooms I am in, turn lights down low, turn off stereo or tv for a few minutes, deep conscious breaths before moving into my quiet space.

When it's time, I move into my sanctuary, being mindful that coming through the door is like a portal into a quieter, more peaceful space - mentally and physically.

I sometimes light candles, sometimes read, sometimes do relaxation exercises, sometimes just sit quietly in reflection. Whatever feels like the next right thing in those moments. Usually depends on the kind of day I've had.

Then, when it is time, in the moments before sleep I relax into a simple gratitude meditation, and allow myself to slip into restfulness.

Evenings and mornings are the most sacred times of the day, so I treat them as such.