How to Train an Elephant (book)

[FeeHutch]

This week is about seeing the space around things and eventually seeing the space around our thoughts more clearly too.
I'm feeling a bit baffled right now because I feel unsure what to look for?

[Gareth]

See the gaps between your thoughts. Sometimes they are big, sometimes they are small.

[FeeHutch]

Yes the gaps between thoughts I get and do see in my mind. It is the searching for the physical gaps I am struggling with. I can't see the air and the gap between the frames of my door for example is air and I can see the things in the next room

I might just be mindful of the gaps between my thoughts because that is a concept I find easier to understand and indeed do I still struggle cognitively at times and I think this is one of those times

[Steve]

It might help if you think of it this way: a hole (eg in a piece of paper) is defined by the material around it so the material is defining a space. Similarly, the size of a piece of paper is defined by the space around it (other wise the sheet of paper would be infinitely large). Objects therefore need the space around them to define them as objects.

NB just regard the air as space for the purpose of this.

Thinking about these abstract things can, I believe, be another form of meditation (if that sort of thing appeals to you). It gets even more interesting when you consider wave/particle duality - the 'space' concept may then not apply and if everything is actually more wavelike in character its easier to see how everything may be 'connected'.

Steve

[FeeHutch]

Yes that is what I was considering when I gave this more thought last night It would be pretty boring if I just grasped every idea straight away I suppose

[FeeHutch]

OK so seeing the space around things, I think I did get there in the end. Even when everything around you at your level feels busy or congested, if you look up there is so much empty space and it helps give a different perspective. I think it is suggested during the 8 week course that we should look up more often. I remember doing it last year and noticing all these things on the upper floors of building, plaques on buildings, statues and engraving I had just never seen before. It made me think about how we can get tunnel vision and not really see what is actually going on around us.

The same is definitely true of thoughts. This week came at the perfect time for me. This coming week is a very challenging one for me in several different ways and I have been extra mindful over the last couple of weeks not to get caught up in negative thoughts, racing ahead and deciding the outcomes and also loosing sight of a couple of really positive events I have planned too. It is so easy to feel consumed and crushed by all these thoughts and worries and actually there is a lot of breathing space available if I pay attention.

OK so week 24 - already!
Mindful eating. I have written on another thread about trying to fast a couple of times a week for the health benefits. The task this week is to concentrate on enjoying eating bit by bite, put cutlery or the food item down between mouthfuls and be really present for the experience.

I have tried this before and the first few times I noticed I was incredibly resistant to really being present when I eat. This doesn't wholly surprise me because I had years of eating disorders in my teens and early 20's. I found paying attention to what I was eating provoked extreme anxiety and that was because I had used food to bury emotions for so long. For me binging was a deliberately mindless activity too. It is noted in the discoveries for this week that this is one of the most challenging mindful-eating practices and it brings awareness of how we so often 'layer' bites of food, putting more in our mouths before we even finish what is already in there.

I notice in the deeper lessons section it says 'this is actually a task about becoming aware of impatience' which rings very true for me. It is a reoccurring theme when trying to be more mindful too. I remember the week we had to take 3 breaths before answering the phone and it seemed like an impossibly long time to wait! The idea we should be doing 4 things at once including eating is such a seemingly accepted part of our culture now that I have to admit the thought of doing my own thing does make me feel a bit conspicuous

Phew, right I am done How has your week been Steve?

[Steve]

Sounds as if you managed to notice quite a bit of space. When I did remember, I did find that it helped me to look at things slightly differently and, more importantly, being aware of space made me more aware of my surroundings (and so not lost in thought).

I noticed that space was necessary for things to move about, that cups and spoons created a space to receive things. I like being outdoors and that is very much because of the space and sense of freedom this provides. I like clear space and that untidiness causes a lack of space - the stuff clutters it up. I also found silence to be similar - a space between noises. My thoughts have been on overdrive this week so I have had less success noticing spaces between thoughts except during still and quiet formal meditations. But it helped when I realised that space in the mind is the same space that the body is in - there isn't an inside and an outside space - its one and the same - and that an object does not displace space but simply exists in space.

One spoonful at a time - at first sight this does not sound difficult so its good to have the warning that it may well be very difficult (as I suspect it might). I shall watch out for the impatience aspect - it will be good if it helps take things slowly and to savour each mouthful (and moment).

Hope you have a good week

Steve

[FeeHutch]

Well I didn't really manage the task of mindful eating this week. In an avalanche of other events and emotions I lost sight of taking the time to eat mindfully. It is something I am going to keep working with.

This week is about being mindful of our desires, for everything from food to sex to 5 minutes more sleep. This made me smile:

We are not much different from a toddler. We could be walking contentedly through the mall, and suddenly we smell cinnamon buns. We can watch desire arise and begin to nag, negotiate, and rationalise in our mind. It takes determination to stop the internal argument and switch the mind-stream to something healthier.

My shopping is die to be delivered in an hour. I have ordered cinnamon buns. Last week they didn't send any and I had the slightly more grown up version of a tantrum. I am currently very VERY aware of my desire for the buns. Desire makes us feel alive but I do know it is not always directing our behaviour in a positive way. So in a hour I will be mindful of my desire and assuming they arrive this week I will maybe wait until after my lunch, see if I am still hungry and then mindfully eat the bun. This looks like an interesting week as always Steve

[Gareth]

Sounds fascinating stuff Fiona. Keep practising and never, ever stop.

[FeeHutch]

I've still not eaten my bun, waiting until everyone is ready for their pudding