New to the whole thing

[cgrayx]

Hi,

I am new to the whole mindfulness thing - and joined the forum as somebody on Twitter (Gareth) told me about it.

I am considering doing a 8 week course, but before I commit that much to something I think it'll be better for me to become a regular mindfulness meditator.

I really do struggle with all the meditations though - I was watching/listening to a guided meditation on Youtube, and it involved lying down (body scan) but I just really struggled with it. I felt myself flinching, not being still, and making odd movements I wouldn't ordinarily make. Is this expected when you first start?

Also, It'd be nice to hear your anecdotal personal experiences/benefits from Mindfulness. I am aware of the evidence of the neuro/psychological side, but am wondering what personal benefits it has had on your life.

N.B. Even when I tried to meditate on breathing then, I didn't do very well. I sort of give up after 10 minutes, which is never good. It's crazy how the mind self-sabotages. One minute I start thinking of something as mundane as 'Desperate Housewives' (It is a TV show), next my mind jumps to me anticipating writing this message projecting my failure at meditating, etc. It is really difficult, but I'll conquer it. I might try the guided meditations.

Thanks for your help,

I imagine you have to answer this sort of tedious question all the time, apologies.

[JonW]

Hi Cgrayx,
Good to hear from you.
I'm fairly new to all this too. I started meditating in early December, using the guided audios that come with the Mark Williams/Danny Penman book. The guided meditations definitely helped me when I started out. Now I alternate between guided meditations and going it alone.
It's important not to judge yourself, especially at first. The fact that you are noticing yourself fidgeting is a good thing - that in itself is being mindful.
I'm currently halfway through an eight-week course in Brighton - two hours every Saturday morning. I'm finding that has deepened my meditations and made it easier for me to focus on my breathing when I meditate at home.
It's still early days for me but the benefits have been huge. I was in a terrible state back in December - depressed and very anxious. I don't feel depressed or anxious at the moment.
I'd be interested to hear how you progress. It's not easy at first and it does take some perseverance. Or maybe "commitment" is a better word. As Jon Kabat-Zinn says, "You don't have to enjoy it. You just have to do it." Speaking from personal experience I can say that the benefits come amazingly quickly if one is committed to daily meditation. Sometimes I do twenty minutes, sometime I do an hour, it depends how I feel.
All best, Jon

[FeeHutch]

Hi Cgrayx and welcome to our community
There is nothing tedious about your questions and I'm glad to see John has shared his thoughts with you. If you click the link in my signature you can read a piece I wrote about my own discovery of mindfulness.
I also wrote a piece about why people practise mindfulness using the input of other community members which can be found here http://www.dailywaffle.co.uk/2013/01/mindfulness

I hope these are helpful and I look forward to getting to know you better.
Fiona

[Gareth]

Hi Charlie, and welcome to the forum.

This is not a tedious question at all, it is in fact the whole reason for this forum.

If you have never meditated before, then it is a completely alien thing to do. At this stage you just need to keep doing it, every day ideally. Give up on the notion of trying to achieve anything, and just follow the process. Everyone who is coming to meditation for the first time has the same questions that you have. I certainly did. You really need to grow into your practice, which takes time and patience.

Go easy on yourself, and rest easy in the knowledge that any human being can do this. You cannot do it wrong

[JonW]

Exactly what Gareth said. I couldn't agree more.
I found that reading widely on the subject (whilst adhering to the idea of the 8-week course) helped me a lot at the very start of my practice.
Oli Doyle's Mindfulness Plain And Simple is one of the books I read. Excellent value for 77p (Kindle version). In it Doyle writes, "The mindfulness path is simple and straight but the mind is complicated and crooked." That thought helped me get over some of the early bumps in the road, when my mind was especially fidgety.
I'm also relieved that my dog and my cat no longer fuss and worry over me when I begin my practice. At first they obviously thought there was something wrong with me. Now they just let me be. If they remain quiet for the duration of my practice they each get a biscuit.

[Gareth]

If they remain quiet for the duration of my practice they each get a biscuit.

[JonW]

Hello cgrayx,
You asked us to share any personal experiences that related to mindfulness.
One that springs to mind is my recent dental surgery. I've always been terrified of the dentist, really terrified. I recently learned that I had chronic gum disease and that most of my teeth would have to be extracted, and that I would have to wear dentures.
I finished my surgery last week. I'm not going to pretend it was enjoyable. It was far from enjoyable. But the whole experience was a small fraction as painful had I not been mindful. I didn't stress out to the point of madness weeks in advance. In the dentist chair I concentrated on my breathing and accepted the pain for what it was - previously I'd have been making the pain a hundred times worse by thinking about it and piling on the anguish.
Now I'm wearing my dentures and, for the time being, I'm limited in terms of what I can eat. So I'm being as mindful as I can about all that.

[cgrayx]

Thanks for all your replies and personal experiences; it is very helpful.

I have been reading Buddhist philosophy for years and meditating scarcely in between (not Vipasanna/mindfulness though).

Having just meditated for 20 minutes today, I don't know why, but it does make me feel a lot more grounded. As in at peace with myself. It sounds almost hippyish and cheesy when I say it, but it is an enjoyable feeling.

Anyone got any particularly good guided meditations they use or have used?

[larorra]

Hi cgrayx,

Welcome to our community, just a short reply for me as i write off my phone and the auto corrector continually wins against me! Just wanted to add you don't need to meditate lying down do it in whatever position is comfortable to you, i bodyscan sitting in a chair, as i have arthritis in the spine, lying down is a no -no for me, i like to walk mindfully although this is more of an informal meditation. I think you may notice that the senses are heightened by meditating, for me as i walk and really see my surroundings, trees, sky, iclouds etc, through mindfulness Its amazing! Good luck with your mindful journey!

[rara]

Having just meditated for 20 minutes today, I don't know why, but it does make me feel a lot more grounded. As in at peace with myself. It sounds almost hippyish and cheesy when I say it, but it is an enjoyable feeling.

Hello an welcome It makes you feel grounded because even if just a little, you are training your body to be relaxed and alert. Even if it's just for a short while even, this is good progress and before you know it, you'll notice a huge progression.

My personal benefits? Over time I have found myself able to concentrate a lot better in my ordinary life. Nothing get's the better of me anymore because I feel in control of myself...even though I can't control the world around me, I can certainly deal with anything life throws at me. I am also more composed...I don't panic at the dropping of bad news, I calmly fix what I can and be done with it

Guided meditations aren't for me so I can't advise any further than going to see a teacher or class. I see you're interested in Buddhism...any temples round your way you could pay a visit to?

Finally, what impresses me is when you came out and acknowledged that you noticed your body fidgeting and mind drifting. Keep noticing these moments and eventually you'll crack the code to stopping them. Never control the body, just the mind...the body will follow. It's just a shell with joints at the end of the day.