Back to Thinking Mode

Post here if you are just starting out with your mindfulness practice. Mindfulness is a really difficult concept to get your head around at first, and it might be that you would benefit from some help from others.
Ibnezubair
Posts: 33
Practice Mindfulness Since: 06 May 2016

Sat Jun 02, 2018 11:23 am  

On the advice of JonW, I got Finding Peace In A Frantic World by Mark Williams & Danny Penman, and started following it. It was October last year. Last 7 months were marvelous. First time in my life I was so comfortable, calm and peaceful. No doubt there were ups and downs, but all of it was managed beautifully; downs were being observed mindfully. But from last seven days, my mind had very strong tendencies to switch to thinking and doing mode, and I have one again a very miserable life.
I am constantly doing prescribed 10 to 15 minutes meditation, twice a day. Throughout my day, I try do mindful movements, mindful breathing and body scans. Many a times, things settle down and my mind becomes comparatively peaceful. But when there are trying moments, it completely fails to stay in awareness mode, and switches to doing or thinking mode. I have also tried to look at the overall situation as turbulence in stream, after a long period of calm flowing. But all has failed. Once or twice in a day, I just get very miserable. All this has affected the daily routine of meditation also. During meditations, my focus is weak, and thinking process continues, “on the surface” as well as “under the surface”. My mind inclines to think that good period is over, and I will not be able to be peaceful again.
Though, I have experienced through out my life, that thinking or doing mode of mind has done nothing good to me. It has always failed to solve the problems. It only contributed to frustrations, multiplying the problems and associated anxiety and creating feelings of dead end situations. But I don’t know why, a part of my mind is also inclined to think that awareness mode is also not good for giving solutions to problems. Instead of giving solutions, it distracts you from problems, and problems continue to linger on. Though I know this notion is not true, and my experience is different, but even then, at time this notion takes control of my thinking.
So, what to do?

ibnezubair

JonW
Team Member
Posts: 2897
Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Sat Jun 02, 2018 1:14 pm  

Maybe try a slightly different approach, Ibnezubair?
I've co-written a book, The Turning Point, which offers a different 8 week course, complete with easily accessible guided meditations. Maybe give that a try?
Cheers,
Jon
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Turning-Point- ... =jon+wilde
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
Follow this link to join the WhatsApp group and receive notifications: https://chat.whatsapp.com/K5j5deTvIHVD7z71H3RIIk

Ibnezubair
Posts: 33
Practice Mindfulness Since: 06 May 2016

Sat Jun 02, 2018 8:21 pm  

@JonW
1. Your recommended book is published recently, and is not available in my country, Pakistan.
2. Why to try new approach? Is the previous approach faulty?
3. Is not it better that I continue the previous approach and if I am not following it properly, I should be given advice to correct it?
4. I am quite convinced with the approach and have much inclination to continue it.
Thank you.

ibnezubair

JonW
Team Member
Posts: 2897
Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Sun Jun 03, 2018 10:32 pm  

'I am quite convinced with the approach and have much inclination to continue it.'

Then continue it.
Problem solved.
Cheers,
Jon
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
Follow this link to join the WhatsApp group and receive notifications: https://chat.whatsapp.com/K5j5deTvIHVD7z71H3RIIk

Ibnezubair
Posts: 33
Practice Mindfulness Since: 06 May 2016

Mon Jun 04, 2018 5:04 am  

'Then continue it.
Problem solved.'

I really did not expect this type of guidance. I expect more compassionate one.
The question is, "Should I always change the approach whenever I face some problem with the present one?"

ibnezubair

Deborah1
Posts: 27

Mon Jun 04, 2018 7:08 am  

Hi Ibnezubair

I am not in a position to advise as I'm much newer to mindfulness than you.

So far I have not been as successful as you have regarding mindfulness and yesterday and today my thinking has gone wrong yet again

I think it is a case of perservering despite the setbacks. Right now my mind is saying what's the point and because my 'success' has been very poor it is difficult to believe it's helping.

So I suppose my problem is similar to yours. Given you've had good results before then I think (though I may be wrong) that you should carry on with the same book.

In my situation I'm trying to say to myself that it's worth carrying on even if my mind doesn't respond, because despite all the negatives my mind is telling me' it's not making my mind worse. Will my mind sort? I really don't know. I'm trying tto see my thoughts as part of where I am just now. All the negatives thoughts are part of my experience. Don't get me wrong I sound more accepting than I feel and I constantly worry about the future. I really think I can't help it.

Regarding lack of compassion. I have felt that once or twice but I wouldn't let that put you off. I've no doubt that everyone on here wants the best for you. Maybe you're like me, because you're hurting you need a gentle approach. I would listen to those who know better than me and assure you that I feel for you as you go through this tough time.

Take care
Deb

Ibnezubair
Posts: 33
Practice Mindfulness Since: 06 May 2016

Mon Jun 04, 2018 8:21 am  

Thank your Deb,
It feels that things are getting out of hand. For one week, I did continue to stick to mindfulness. But it seems to me that my mind has started to give up.

ibnezubair

Ibnezubair
Posts: 33
Practice Mindfulness Since: 06 May 2016

Tue Jun 05, 2018 4:10 am  

Due to some reason JonW is not helping me. Would any one else from the experienced ones guide me, so that I could be out of this situation.

ibnezubair

User avatar
Gareth
Site Admin
Posts: 1465

Tue Jun 05, 2018 10:55 am  

You're right when you think of 'turbulence in the stream'. Unfortunately the stream never stops flowing, and it's course is forever undulating.

I know Jon, and I know that his commitment to mindfulness and helping others is absolute. I think that it's just that sometimes we run out of ways to help people.

I practise mindfulness every day, and there are still times that I feel low, times that I feel like giving up and even times that I feel despair.

Mindfulness will not stop you having difficult feelings; it doesn't work like that.

I remember a time when I had been meditating for couple of years and had been feeling massive amounts of peace for a prolonged period. All of a sudden there was a major upheaval at work, and this sent my mind spinning. It felt like the mindfulness rug had been pulled from beneath me. It took a long time for this to pass, but like everything else: it passed.

I think the advice to experiment with your practice is good advice.

Ibnezubair
Posts: 33
Practice Mindfulness Since: 06 May 2016

Tue Jun 05, 2018 2:50 pm  

Gareth, thank you for your help.
Yes, I respect Jon and admire him for his commitment. In past he has given me valuable advices. I am always thankful to him.

"I think the advice to experiment with your practice is good advice". Did you mean to try some different approach, as Jon advised me?
Thank you.
Ibnezubair

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