Why is it that people stop meditating?

[MiM]

But you did ask why...

[piedwagtail91]

If you keep up a good and regular practice difficulties, problems and worries need not arise.
I read somewhere that there are no difficulties or problems in life. That these arise when we add thought to the situation.
Meditation will maintain awareness and most of the time a situation can either be fixed or accepted before it grows to a worry.

[jdandre]

I read somewhere that there are no difficulties or problems in life. That these arise when we add thought to the situation.
Meditation will maintain awareness and most of the time a situation can either be fixed or accepted before it grows to a worry.

Tolle says this a lot, and it's true - though it can be met with violent opposition if you try to discuss the concept with someone who is attached to their suffering*.

To quote from "The Power of Now":

"Ultimately... there are no problems. Only situations - to be dealt with now, or to be left alone and accepted as part of the 'isness' of the present moment until they change or can be dealt with... 'Problem' means that you are dwelling on a situation mentally without there being a true intention or possibility of taking action now... or you are carrying in your mind the insane burden of a hundred things that you will or may have to do in the future instead of focusing your attention on the one thing that you can do now."

And, in regard to dealing with a situation, you have three options:

"Remove yourself from the situation, change it, or accept it totally. If you want to take responsibility for your life, you must choose one of these three options, and you must choose now. Then accept the consequences. No excuses. No negativity. No psychic pollution. Keep your inner space clear."

Everything is is self-imposed suffering.

*I'm reminded of this quote from Thich Nhat Hanh:

People have a hard time letting go of their suffering. Out of a fear of the unknown, they prefer suffering that is familiar.

[JonW]

It was Gareth's question to begin with.
Jon

[Brad]

But I didn't claim that I removed myself from the neuroses of being a human being, only that I don't meditate to fix myself.
Jon

No I know, it was just friendly banter to "Why wait until it starts raining before you attend to the leaks in your roof?" I'm sorry if it read as an attempt to put words in your mouth.

Your response now has me reflecting on what the differences between "fixing yourself" and "training the mind" are. Maybe that could be a whole new conversation in a separate topic.

[JonW]

Well, I know some forms of meditation are referred to as "training the mind" but I don't see mindfulness that way and that's not the way I approach it. To begin with, it's as much about turning towards the body as towards thoughts. I really just see it as paying attention. "Training", to me, implies striving towards some kind of end result, and I'm uncomfortable with that idea as it doesn't tally with my experience of mindfulness.
Once we become attached to outcome, the game is surely up.
All good things,
Jon, Hove

[Rollen]

First of all, hello there. I just discovered this place and thought it would benefit me to get involved here so that I can stick to it this time.

I practiced meditation for about a month around May this year and then stopped completely until last week. The reason I started is because I work in a middle school and was going through an extremely stressful textbook collection period, where I was dealing with hundreds of students for six straight hours, eating during inconsistent lunch hours, and trying to work out drop off times with every teacher at the school. I stumbled across a meditation article at Nerd Fitness and decided to give it a try. It worked in calming me down, but I was frustrated because I approached it with the thinking, "I'm going to do this to help me deal with this particular problem" and the benefits didn't come fast enough for my liking. Once the school year ended and my life calmed down, I didn't see the need for it anymore because it was a "thing" that I only needed to deal with one particular scenario in my life.

Fast forward to last week, when I went through another stressful event that was making it difficult for me to sleep. I re-read the Nerd Fitness article and then picked up Dan Harris' 10% Happier book. Harris' book really clicked for me, and I'm approaching this in a new light, with the thinking that it's not something to do briefly and just toss aside, but a life habit that I need to do daily, like showering and brushing my teeth.

I knew that this was something I wanted to stick with when I noticed that almost immediately I stopped doing one of my nervous tics (hair pulling). Yesterday, completely at random I was besieged by three full classrooms of noisy students, and while in the past I would have been furious and spent the whole day seething about it, I stepped back, acknowledged my frustration, and shockingly I wasn't even phased by it 10 minutes after it happened. My girlfriend was surprised when I told her this because that's not how I typically operate.

Long story short, I didn't expect immediate benefits, but I got them. Now I just need to keep on keeping on. I'm doing the FPIAFW 8 week program to force myself to stick with it, as well as using the Calm.com app during my lunch breaks. In general I haven't been able to shut up about how much better I've been feeling after a mere 1 week of doing this. I think coming at this again but with a different mindset is helping enormously, since every day I'm excited about doing it.

[JonW]

Hi Rollen,
Welcome to the forum. Please feel free to make yourself at home here.
Great to hear that you're doing the FPIAFW course. We've got a thread devoted to that, in case you were interested.
viewtopic.php?f=21&t=3456
In the meantime, I look forward to chatting with you here on the forum.
All good things,
Jon, Hove

[Gareth]

I'm approaching this in a new light, with the thinking that it's not something to do briefly and just toss aside, but a life habit that I need to do daily, like showering and brushing my teeth.

That's certainly how I approach it.

Good luck!

[jdandre]

Harris' book really clicked for me, and I'm approaching this in a new light, with the thinking that it's not something to do briefly and just toss aside, but a life habit that I need to do daily, like showering and brushing my teeth.

Harris' book is great - he is doing a wonderful job promoting mindfulness and meditation to the masses. If you want to delve into deeper concepts, I highly suggest Sam Harris' book "Waking Up." Note - Dan and Sam aren't related, though they are friends. You can find an excellent interview of Dan by Sam here.

In regard to your practice, it's great to hear you've had short-term success. Your approach is a healthy one as well. My only recommendation when it comes to a consistent practice and long-term habit is to develop a solid understanding of your mind: how compulsive it is, the problems it creates in your daily life, awareness of all the non-stop activity, etc. Sam Harris' book will help to that end, but the best resource by far (in my opinion) is Tolle's "The Power of Now."