Everyday Mindfulness

Hi experienced practitioners
I started practicing only a few days ago and because I have meditated before I am quite familiar with the practise but this time after a severe bout of depression I decided to practice seriously and have me guided by the book
‘The mindful way through depression ‘

I am so surprised how well the practise is already working for me and begin to understand how I can get out of my dark moods

One important question though I do have:

Why do I feel rather ‘flat’ in my mood
Not particularly happy nor blue
Do I loose my spontaneity by practising or is this just inexperience I am going through?

I know I overthink this probably way too much but it kind of scares me

Pls anyone , help me out with this question
Thanks

Hi Hans,
Welcome to the forum.
The Mindful Way Through Depression is an excellent book. Well chosen.
I wouldn't worry too much about experiencing flatness of mood at this early stage of practice. It can take a while for your practice to bed in so that you begin feeling the benefits.
At this stage, I'd also recommend not getting too hooked on the idea of using meditation to 'get rid' of dark moods. Mindfulness isn't really about getting rid of anything. It's not about stopping thoughts and it's not about striving to attain a particular emotional state.
It's about being with whatever arises in your experience from moment to moment.
Please feel free to ask any other questions that arise.
Wishing you all the very best,
Jon

Thanks Jon

What Jon said, and regarding losing one's spontaneity because of Mindfulness:

In my experience, the opposite is much more likely. I, for example, have become a lot more spontaneous.I give a lot less power to thoughts about what might go wrong. And there are also a lot less of those thoughts too. I let most things unfold as they come, and go.

Very often we predict a wrong outcome, and let that prediction guide us. When one gains perspective through mindfulness, one becomes less afraid or acts less upon those fears. Very often things turn out beautifully when at first a disaster was feared.