A lost practice

[Brad]

I'm in a bad place with my practice these days. I started a job about six months ago, and prior to that I was in a job search for about two months. During the job search I had lots of time to meditate and was averaging about four hours of meditation a day. It transformed my mind in the most amazing way. I was incredibly happy and tackled stressful events like job interviews with calm and clarity.

After starting the job, my practice slowly deteriorated. Work demanded more and more of my time and energy. Now I just can't seem to re-establish a routine of any sort. I'm constantly thinking to myself, "I have to get back to that place", but the stakes seem so high and I feel so far from where I was that I just keep slipping. I'm constantly beating myself up for ever letting this happen. It's a vicious cycle.

Does anyone have any advice?

[JonW]

Hi Brad,
Good to hear from you.
Here's my advice.
Go right back to basics.
Start with a couple of five-minute breath meditations each day.
Do that for a week or so.
Then start adding a few more minutes to the meditation, maybe throw in a body scan.
Just ease your way back into practice.
You'll get plenty of support on here.
But be gentle with yourself. Just nice and easy.
Jon, Hove

[FeeHutch]

What Jon said (I'm thinking of making that my new signature)

I am a firm believer in not doing my practice in one lump but doing it during the day. I have also deliberately stopped keeping track of how much I practice each day. For me facts and figures and tracking both work really well in many parts of my life but not this one. Be kind to yourself.

[Brad]

Thanks for the advice and support guys. After posting the topic, I actually shut my laptop and did a four hour session to try and kick myself back into gear, then came back to this thread to see opposing advice, ha! But what you guys said makes sense. I've just had a tough time accepting that I have to "go back to basics" because it feels like I'm really just starting over. Anyway, thanks for the support! Being more active in this community should probably be part of my practice!

[KathleenH]

Hi Brad,

Good to hear you have a new job but sorry to hear you have had a bump in the road of practice.

Remember, life is ever changing and nothing stays the same.

As there is no goal in meditation you aren't starting over, you are just starting a different phase in your continuing practice. It's evolving and changing to fit in with your daily life, if you can only do 5 minutes one day and 30 the next then so be it.

I hope you find your balance again.

Kx

[JonW]

"After posting the topic, I actually shut my laptop and did a four hour session to try and kick myself back into gear…"

Not the kind of guy who does things by halves then?
Cheers,
Jon

[Matt Y]

I would recommend quality over quantity! No one would recommend running a marathon every day, not even someone training for one. And a four hour sit sounds like a marathon to me. Fifteen to twenty minutes is probably about ideal. And even a few moments or minutes here and there is useful.

[Gareth]

My life is terrifically busy too. The thing I did to make sure that I get practice every day was to make meditation the very first thing that I do in the morning. I set my alarm half an hour earlier than necessary, I wake, I meditate, then carry on with the rest of my day. This way, the demands of the day can never push meditation off the agenda. It means that I'm in bed a little earlier every night, but it's a small price to pay when compared to the benefits that meditation brings me.

[FeeHutch]

Hi Brad
Thanks for the update.
I am struggling a bit to find out where to slot my sitting practice back in to my day. As I've written on another thread I am bringing myself back into the moment many times a day and get a lot from the continual practice.
I used to enjoy longer sitting practices (although I don't think I ever managed 4 hours!) but right now it's not feeling right for me.
I guess allowing my practice to be what it is in the moment and not judge it feels like a really valuable piece of insight for me.