Hard time integrating mindfulness and creativity

[fmultimedia]

Hi all!

This is my first post in this forum. I first learnt about mindfulness over 10 years back, practised a bit of it, but never truly serisouly. Recently, though, I started over and it has been a very rich and rewarding experience. I have an overactive mind and it's been helping me with anxiety and general mental exhaustion. But I'm having some trouble and I'd love to hear from other people who practise it what they have to say.

So, I'm generally a very creative person. I'm a language teacher and also I do creative writing for fun. The thing is, the moments I'm the most creative are when I get really carried away by some idea, concept or storyline - so carried away I barely notice what's actually going on around me. For example, I'm in the bus and I'm thinking about the class I have to teach, and a cool game comes to mind, then I start playing out possible scenarios, dialogues with my students, things they'd be able to say or not in the foreign language, etc. Or I'm cooking at home and a character of one of my books comes to mind, starts having a whole dialogue or going on some adventure and it all plays out in my head. It's not uncommon for me to almost completely blank out everything else that's going on around me and live those thoughts (inconsciously) nearly as if they were happening there and then. It's not rare for me to speak out loud the lines if I'm alone at home. I've been like this for as long as I can remember, from when I was a child full of imaginary adventures and through my university and masters years, when I wrote most of my essays in my mind while I was completely distracted.

Thing is, since I started doing mindful mediations and applying mindfulness to every day activities, those moments have drastically diminished. Often I think "well it's time to prepare my class, let's do it with awareness", but then my mind goes blank. For me, it seems nearly impossible to be present and aware, while also to give leeway to my imagination to work unguided.

I know my craetive process might not be the healthiest or the most common (my mum was often concerned I might have a condition while I was a child lol), but that's how I've been living and working all my life, so I'm asking for some help. I'd love to hear your comments. BTW: I may sound like it, but I'm not a wacko, I have a family, two kids, work in a university and have a generally very functional life. =p

Thanks!

[Peter]

Hi fm,
Welcome to the forum. Thanks for sharing your experience. It sounds to me that you want to have your cake and eat it too. On the one hand you're telling that you have an overactive mind and mindfulness' been helping you with anxiety and general mental exhaustion. And on the other hand it seems that you want this overactive mind for your creativity. I can understand why you'd like that, but studies have shown that a wandering mind is a unhappy mind (source). It seems that mindfulness is working great for you. Maybe the price you've to pay for a peaceful mind is letting go of this 'ability' to get so immersed in your thoughts.

Peter

[Gareth]

Try the book 'Mindfulness for Creativity' by Danny Penman.

[fmultimedia]

Hi fm,
Welcome to the forum. Thanks for sharing your experience. It sounds to me that you want to have your cake and eat it too. On the one hand you're telling that you have an overactive mind and mindfulness' been helping you with anxiety and general mental exhaustion. And on the other hand it seems that you want this overactive mind for your creativity. I can understand why you'd like that, but studies have shown that a wandering mind is a unhappy mind. It seems that mindfulness is working great for you. Maybe the price you've to pay for a peaceful mind is letting go of this 'ability' to get so immersed in your thoughts.

Peter

Thanks for the reply. Yes, you pretty much described me. I'd have to find new ways to work by giving up that creative mind... It'd be very... frustrating to give up on that.

Try the book 'Mindfulness for Creativity' by Danny Penman.

I'll have a look into it! Thanks!

[JonW]

Hi fmultimedia, and welcome to the forum.
Gareth's suggestion is a good one. The Penman book is an excellent one.
You write, 'Often I think "well it's time to prepare my class, let's do it with awareness", but then my mind goes blank. For me, it seems nearly impossible to be present and aware, while also to give leeway to my imagination to work unguided.'
If you need your imagination to work unguided when you are preparing a class, then allow it to work unguided. The goal is not to be mindful 24/7. If you are driving a car, then simply drive the car. All you need to be aware of when driving is your own safety and that of others. Though it may be useful to notice when your mind is wandering when driving, then bring your attention back to driving carefully.
If you are preparing a class, do what you need to do. If you find yourself getting stressed out when preparing that class, then bring your attention back to the breath (or another anchor) for a few moments. Then carry on with the planning. If you need your imagination to run riot, let it run. There should be no reason for mindfulness to stifle creativity in any way. If you find that thoughts about mindfulness ('I need to be aware when I'm doing this') get in the way of creativity, then drop those thoughts while you are engaged in that creative act. And use mindfulness for those areas of your life that benefit from it - noticing negative spirals of thought etc.
I hope this is of some help.
All good things,
Jon, Brighton

[fmultimedia]

Hi fmultimedia, and welcome to the forum.
Gareth's suggestion is a good one. The Penman book is an excellent one.
You write, 'Often I think "well it's time to prepare my class, let's do it with awareness", but then my mind goes blank. For me, it seems nearly impossible to be present and aware, while also to give leeway to my imagination to work unguided.'
If you need your imagination to work unguided when you are preparing a class, then allow it to work unguided. The goal is not to be mindful 24/7. If you are driving a car, then simply drive the car. All you need to be aware of when driving is your own safety and that of others. Though it may be useful to notice when your mind is wandering when driving, then bring your attention back to driving carefully.
If you are preparing a class, do what you need to do. If you find yourself getting stressed out when preparing that class, then bring your attention back to the breath (or another anchor) for a few moments. Then carry on with the planning. If you need your imagination to run riot, let it run. There should be no reason for mindfulness to stifle creativity in any way. If you find that thoughts about mindfulness ('I need to be aware when I'm doing this') get in the way of creativity, then drop those thoughts while you are engaged in that creative act. And use mindfulness for those areas of your life that benefit from it - noticing negative spirals of thought etc.
I hope this is of some help.
All good things,
Jon, Brighton

Wow, this is some amazing advice! So simple yet it really makes sense to me. Thank you so much, because I was really feeling like I had to choose between mindfulness and creativity, and it's really reassuring to think that's not the case.

Again, thank you so much.

[JonW]

My pleasure, fmultimedia. Enjoy those creative bursts!
Best wishes,
Jon

[Peter]

Excellent advice from Jon, and Gareth!

Just to be clear, I didn't mean that mindfulness and creativity cancel each other out. On the contrary, mindfulness can make the mind clearer (less burdened with redundant thoughts), which often helps creativity. I was talking about the fact that you indicated that your excessive immersive thoughts were a problem for you, which mindfulness had helped you with. I think there's no need to want it all, as it were. Mindfulness isn't something that fixes every problem, which is how it is presented in the media, and on internet currently. There seems to be a mindfulness class or book for everything these days.
What I meant was, some things are inherent. If you 'tinker' on one end, you might inherently change something on the other end, and that's fine. When you practice mindfulness 'enough', you inherently going to be more aware. Which probably means that you might stay less (easily) immersed in your thoughts. Which is normally what you'd want out of mindfulness, but there might be cases where it is less desirable.

That being said, I totally agree with Jon that there's no need to be mindful of everything all the time. In this case, just be mindful enough to feel when you are getting too immersed, or maybe too long and take a mindful step back for a while.

Peter

[Orao_22]

It's true that such a wandering mind is often the sign of an unhappy person: it's a form of escapism for your conscience, that would rather bury itself into an imaginary world than into the real one.
I've never thought about it from a mindfulness point of view, but I write stories as well, and was much, MUCH more able to sink in my stories' world and discover new things to tell during my previous relationship, with a person that made it clear I wasn't that important to them for over two years, than now, when I have a fulfilling relationship and a much better professional life.

[JonW]

'It's true that such a wandering mind is often the sign of an unhappy person.'

All minds wander, even the minds of those who have been meditating for forty years. In mindfulness, we don't judge the fact that our minds are wandering. We simply notice and bring our attention back to present moment experience.
Jon