I have read all the classics on the subject. I have ploughed through Full Catastrophe Living (both editions, the 2nd one is even more vague and inaccessible. I have no idea who Kabat-Zinn thinks people suffering massive stress will have the time to read it, let alone untangle it), read the books by Prof Williams and colleagues, a few by TNH and Bhante G and am completely disillusioned.
When I try and practice it seems like thoughts just on the cusp of consciousness keep my attention and act as a barrier to, say, feeling the breath in the stomach. They either pull my attention completely away from the body several times in any 10 second period or dominate the space of conscious awareness so that it feels they take up 90% and bodily sensations only 10%.
At the end of my practices I am roused by the alarm I set, CD or whatever and look back and the whole practice has just been a session of pre-conscious daydreaming. I know that you shouldn't think of this endeavour in terms of success & failure but I am beginning to become completely fed-up with making time for a practice which is just an exercise in daydreaming.
Has anyone else had this experience and what did you do about it?
Is there any point to this practice?
yes even after 2 years of practice I sometimes find that my mind drifts off for long periods, the fact that I notice this, means that I'm being mindful so I dont become too concerned. Plus, like most things it gets better with practice.
I've found the guided sessions on www.getsomeheadspace.com really useful. I think my formal practice took a massive leap forward when I started this, there is a charge unfortunately but think you can trial it for free for a few weeks. why don't you try that, and report back?
I've found the guided sessions on www.getsomeheadspace.com really useful. I think my formal practice took a massive leap forward when I started this, there is a charge unfortunately but think you can trial it for free for a few weeks. why don't you try that, and report back?
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Well, it sounds like you've given mindfulness a good go. Maybe it's simply not for everybody. Sorry to hear it hasn't worked out for you. Timing is everything. Maybe it will "click" at a later date.
I was surprised at your comments about Kabat-Zinn's Full Catastrophe Living. I found it easily accessible and read it in two sittings.
Hoping you find a practice that works for you.
Best wishes,
Jon, Hove
I was surprised at your comments about Kabat-Zinn's Full Catastrophe Living. I found it easily accessible and read it in two sittings.
Hoping you find a practice that works for you.
Best wishes,
Jon, Hove
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
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Why don't you try and vary your practice a bit and see if that helps you? Try some mindful listening, looking or tasting. See if these practices sit with you better.
Father Thomas Keating once led a brief centering prayer practice, after which one of the nuns told him that she'd been distracted by 10,000 thoughts. He smiled gently and told her, "Great! You had 10,000 opportunities to come back home."
Distraction is normal, albeit frustrating. But when you notice that you're distracted, you're doing the tough part, that of returning to mindfulness.
I would recommend the basics like fine tuning the technique as others have mentioned such as trying another time of day, guided programs, etc. However, at the end of the day, technique is just technique. It can help, but it won't get you there. All techniques are just ways to distract the mind so that resting in Self is more accessible.
I also note a bit of resistance. It sounds like you may be trying too hard: exerting your mind to control your mind. As Adyashanti says, that's like a dog chasing it's tail to become a dog. I would also recommend checking out Adyashanti's True Meditation program (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZvfG8sLjLl4). He went through something similar to what you describe for years, and in this program he describes how he broke through it to a deeper practice.
Don't be discouraged. The fact that you notice this dynamic and can so clearly express what's going on is actually ground-breaking work. Many, many people just float on the surface of their practice without realizing that they're not going as deep as they could.
Distraction is normal, albeit frustrating. But when you notice that you're distracted, you're doing the tough part, that of returning to mindfulness.
I would recommend the basics like fine tuning the technique as others have mentioned such as trying another time of day, guided programs, etc. However, at the end of the day, technique is just technique. It can help, but it won't get you there. All techniques are just ways to distract the mind so that resting in Self is more accessible.
I also note a bit of resistance. It sounds like you may be trying too hard: exerting your mind to control your mind. As Adyashanti says, that's like a dog chasing it's tail to become a dog. I would also recommend checking out Adyashanti's True Meditation program (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZvfG8sLjLl4). He went through something similar to what you describe for years, and in this program he describes how he broke through it to a deeper practice.
Don't be discouraged. The fact that you notice this dynamic and can so clearly express what's going on is actually ground-breaking work. Many, many people just float on the surface of their practice without realizing that they're not going as deep as they could.
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I've hit this barrier a number of times in my practice and found a really simple solution: have my meditation timer count upward instead of downward.
I find that often when I set a traditional timer/alarm, I get anxious, wait for the bell to ding, and that my mind wanders a lot more. When I set a timer that simply continues to count up and never dings (I typically stop at around 15-30 minutes, though that varies depending on how restless I feel and how much energy I have), I find I concentrate a lot more on my practice because I feel like I'm in control.
I think that in general, the mind tends to be more engaged with what you feel you have control over, and meditation is no exception.
I'd also suggest that if you find your mind is restless during a sitting to get up and practice some mindful walking. You may find this helps you regain control over your practice as well, and that you'll feel a lot more engaged when you sit back down again.
I find that often when I set a traditional timer/alarm, I get anxious, wait for the bell to ding, and that my mind wanders a lot more. When I set a timer that simply continues to count up and never dings (I typically stop at around 15-30 minutes, though that varies depending on how restless I feel and how much energy I have), I find I concentrate a lot more on my practice because I feel like I'm in control.
I think that in general, the mind tends to be more engaged with what you feel you have control over, and meditation is no exception.
I'd also suggest that if you find your mind is restless during a sitting to get up and practice some mindful walking. You may find this helps you regain control over your practice as well, and that you'll feel a lot more engaged when you sit back down again.
I am 11 months into the Headspace programme and find it really helps focus the mind more than other options I have tried, I too still sometimes think I just sat for 20 minutes daydreaming, then remind myself its just how my mind is today, tomorrow may be different and it usually is.
They have recently released version 2, which is a great help, you can set the meditation time, type of meditation you need [stress, anxiety, sleep etc], if you have Iphone or Android give the free 10 days app a bash, nothing to lose.
They have recently released version 2, which is a great help, you can set the meditation time, type of meditation you need [stress, anxiety, sleep etc], if you have Iphone or Android give the free 10 days app a bash, nothing to lose.
There are so many ways to practice mindfulness. Tai chi, yoga, walking meditation, guided meditations, and many great suggestions that have already been made - if you really do feel that disillusioned - but one simple phrase that is worth remembering, and the byline of this site - the journey is the destination.
I suspect that if over time, with practice, you are able to better accept and befriend the mind's tendency to wonder or day dream you will feel less frustrated. Thinking is the mind's job. You simply cannot will it to stop thinking, you can only have the will to apply the principles and at some stage it tends to settle some. But crucial in all this is our expectations. Perhaps you are simply expecting too much.
I practiced for years and years and one day something just clicked, like a switch was flicked. My life is characterized by so much more peace of mind, and sometimes I can achieve a profound stillness but loads of the time my mind still wonders and I am off in a daydream...
I hope this is helpful. Good luck with ongoing practice of some sort - and also remember the importance of non-striving too.
I suspect that if over time, with practice, you are able to better accept and befriend the mind's tendency to wonder or day dream you will feel less frustrated. Thinking is the mind's job. You simply cannot will it to stop thinking, you can only have the will to apply the principles and at some stage it tends to settle some. But crucial in all this is our expectations. Perhaps you are simply expecting too much.
I practiced for years and years and one day something just clicked, like a switch was flicked. My life is characterized by so much more peace of mind, and sometimes I can achieve a profound stillness but loads of the time my mind still wonders and I am off in a daydream...
I hope this is helpful. Good luck with ongoing practice of some sort - and also remember the importance of non-striving too.
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Yes, I think you describe the practice very well. We are so used to being in our thoughts that it is very challenging to 'let go' for a moment and return to our breath.
In fact, I've been practicing for a number of years and the challenge remains to let go and notice my breath. It seems to me that the practice is about doing just that: letting go in the moment, and building the letting go muscle just as you'd build any other - with continual practice (and no other expectation than that the muscle will grow stronger).
You may want to look at any assumptions and beliefs you have about 'what's supposed to happen' and consider what is happening for you instead, and what your intentions are around your practice (noting that it may be too early for you to have clear intentions yet - you can't drive a car in a certain direction until you've figured out how to turn it on, how to use the mirrors and how to accelerate/brake).
I trust that you'll figure it out though. You're trying, you're struggling with it (as most of us have), and you're engaging with other practitioners to try and figure it out. That's a big part of the journey of meditation and I would say you're exactly where you need to be with it. Good luck!
In fact, I've been practicing for a number of years and the challenge remains to let go and notice my breath. It seems to me that the practice is about doing just that: letting go in the moment, and building the letting go muscle just as you'd build any other - with continual practice (and no other expectation than that the muscle will grow stronger).
You may want to look at any assumptions and beliefs you have about 'what's supposed to happen' and consider what is happening for you instead, and what your intentions are around your practice (noting that it may be too early for you to have clear intentions yet - you can't drive a car in a certain direction until you've figured out how to turn it on, how to use the mirrors and how to accelerate/brake).
I trust that you'll figure it out though. You're trying, you're struggling with it (as most of us have), and you're engaging with other practitioners to try and figure it out. That's a big part of the journey of meditation and I would say you're exactly where you need to be with it. Good luck!
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