UNTYING EMOTIONAL KNOTS

[Happy Buddha]

When we practice mindfulness we are not involved in creating any thing special. We are not trying to be something or to experience some altered state of mind.

One way we can see mindfulness practice is that of what I call untying the emotional knots. We are untying the knots we created yesterday, last week, last year and we are untying the knots from childhood.

The further the knot goes back in time the more difficult it is to untie. But untie the knots we can if we know how to, and it’s both very simple and difficult too.

The simplicity is in the fact that all we need to do is to give the knot of energy some kindly attention. The difficulty is that it’s normally the last thing that we want to do.

Every time we get into negative states, such as blaming, condemnation, resentments, complaining, self criticism and numerous other negative emotional states…. we tie a knot in our bodies, and it stays there until we learn how to untie it and let it go. It is the body that pays the price of all these knots. Over the course of our lives can you imagine just how knotted the body can become?

Unlike animals it seems that left to our usual way of being we don’t know how to let go of the knots that we tie every day. The other day I watched two dogs growling and getting ready to fight. The adrenalin was coursing through them. Luckily they parted without a fight, but what I noticed was that one of the dogs just wagged its tail vigorously afterwards as a way of releasing the energy then off it trotted with not a care, and all was well again.

It didn’t seem to hold onto the event like we humans do. What do we do when we get upset with someone or something?…we dwell on it. We tell ourselves the story over and over again. “I’ll get him,” How could she say such a thing,” or “I’ll never get a job, I’m gonna be in poverty for the rest of my life.” Stories stories stories, over and again. We don’t want to let go of that horrible moment, because it makes us feel alive and important.

Noticing how we rerun the stories is the first step in becoming free of the knots. So when we are telling ourselves how bad life is or how horrible someone has been to us, we need to notice those thoughts. Notice the effect they have on our bodies. Then we step out of the spins and come back to the present moment, which includes the body. Simply come back to the body and the senses, don’t let yourself dwell on those dark thoughts, they are killing you and your life.

So that is how we stop creating more knots – by noticing when we are tying them, in time you will find this easier and you will be more relaxed.

The second step is freeing ourselves of knots we have already tied. This is done through awareness of the body. When sitting, what you need to do is to bring awareness into the body and feel it. You may notice that it feels like a fist or like a tight belt, whatever it is just feel it and be curious. By curious I mean notice its different qualities, is it hard or soft? What shape is it? What is the texture of this? Is it heavy or light? Is there an emotion connected to this?

And that is all you need to do. In time you may notice events from the past coming into awareness, this is the body releasing the blocked energy. There may be tears, sadness, gladness, and joy, but trust in the whole process and slowly you are freeing your self of the tyranny of carrying around the burden of the past.

Suryacitta - happy buddha

http://www.mindfulnesscic.co.uk

[JonW]

Beautifully put.
And, of course, when faced with a tight knot (in a shoelace, for example), the best way to loosen it is with gentle patience. You'll never be able to untie the knot if the ends outside of it are pulled taut. Emotional knots are not so very different.
Jon, (former Boy Scout)

[piedwagtail91]

really well put.

[Gareth]

Great stuff again Suryacitta, thank you.

I'll 'publish' this topic on Twitter again soon.

[Happy Buddha]

I like the shoelace analogy - patience is the greatest austerity according to Buddhism - because it SEEMS that we have to give up so much for it.