Mindful practice

[Deborah1]

I am managing to stick to my meditation practice (about 20 minutes) and enjoy it. In FPIAFW I have realised that when my mood drops I immediately try to rationalise it and that gets me nowhere. Knowing this I can usually tell myself it is as it is and stop the thoughts developing.

However, I am aware that I'm not practicing mindfulness during the day. How important is the deliberate mindfulness practice? It seems a silly question but it feels much harder than the meditation.

[JonW]

Sounds like you are doing just great, Deborah.
In my experience, being mindful throughout the day (outside of formal practice) becomes second nature after practicing for some time. Sometimes it involves bringing mindfulness to the moment in a deliberate way (deciding to eat a meal mindfully, for instance, or deciding to walk mindfully). Other times it involves noticing that I'm not being mindful (perhaps I'm walking and realise that I'm completely wrapped up in rumination about the past or worries about the future). In that instance, I'm able to anchor myself in the moment by focussing on my breath or on physical sensations (eg. the sensations in my feet as I walk, or the sensations in my arms as I walk).
This takes practice.
Try not to judge 'progress' on a day by day, meditation by meditation basis. That only leads to needless comparisons ('today's meditation is not as good as yesterday's - I must be doing something wrong). Do your best to let go of thoughts about how well you are progressing. We can't be mindful yesterday, and we can't be mindful tomorrow. We can only be mindful right now, in this moment which is, if you think about it, the only moment we ever have.
The difference mindfulness is making to your life can only be measured in the long term. Although, in a sense, the practice involves building up the 'muscles' of awareness, this is not like going to the gym where progress can be measured on how much weight we have lost or how firm our biceps are. Mindfulness doesn't work that way. It is not goal-oriented in that sense. We are not trying to get anywhere. We are simply learning to be in the moment, and accept whatever is arising in our experience - good, bad or indifferent. This moment has already arrived. We don't have to like it. But we can learn to accept it for what it is, and to realise that wishing the moment away means that we are wishing our life away.
All best,
Jon

[Deborah1]

Thank you Jon for your advice. It totally makes sense. This morning I ate my. breakfast mindfully. I had thought that in a mindful activity you had to get it right, yet I've never thought that in meditation. My mind wanders a lot in my activity. I think you'd say that's ok.

I really believe that working at mindfulness is realistically the only path that could help my anxiety. I take medication and cognitive therapy helped enormously. Regularly though my anxiety comes back with worries anout the future.

If it doesn't help I am at least aware that it's a healthy part of my daily life.

Coming on this site helps as it reinforces my belief.

I do appreciate your's and any advice on here.

Deborah

[JonW]

You are most welcome, Deborah.
And we very much appreciate your posts here on the forum.
Wishing you a great week,
Jon

[Gareth]

mind wanders a lot in my activity. I think you'd say that's ok.

It is OK. The mind wandering will never stop. You may find that with continued practice that it eases somewhat, but it will never stop completely. Nor would you want it to.

With mindfulness, it's like we learn (slowly but surely) a completely new way to relate to our mind: "oh there's another worry; my mind doing it's thing again. Now back to the washing up." If you are prone to anxiety, then I'm sure that worries are going to still come around a lot, but it is possible to achieve freedom from your mind, assuredly.

It's great to watch your progress. Please keep checking in with us. Maybe you can write a blog for us somewhere down the line?

[JonW]

What Gareth said.
Mind wanders. Notice it has wandered. Bring your attention back to your chosen anchor - breath, sound, body sensation etc. Or, in the case of choiceness awareness meditation, train your attention on whatever is noticed as it arises.
Cheers,
Jon

[PDee]

Deborah - I have been dabbling with mindfulness for some years. Even when I say, 'OK, I will go in the bath mindfully from now on,' I often forget. In fact, this is part of one of the 8 week programmes I have committed to, and I still forget!!

As Jon Kabat-Zinn says (near enough) the hardest part is REMEMBERING to be mindful.

We get caught up in all the doing and before we know it, we're away.

The way I see it is that if I can even realise one mindful breath whilst in the midst of activity (whether physical or mental) then I'm doing okay and it's a start.

[JonW]

'The way I see it is that if I can even realise one mindful breath whilst in the midst of activity (whether physical or mental) then I'm doing okay and it's a start.'

Absolutely, it is.
No matter how long you've been meditating for, it is impossible (and I do mean impossible) to be mindful 24/7. But we can form the intention to be as mindful as possible during the day.
It's worth remembering that noticing you are not being mindful is as important as deliberately bringing mindfulness to a certain action (eating, walking etc.)
One way of looking at it is that every moment of the day is a potential invitation to be mindful.
Cheers,
Jon

[Deborah1]

Thank you all for these very helpful replies. And I do understand about just a moment of mindfulness is good. I have actually caught myself in negative thought and managed to pull myself away from it for 20 seconds or so. In fact I saw a deer in a field and a rabbit hopping about on the bus to work. Previously I would have been locked into negative thought and so missed it.

The support on here is so helpful. After the 8 week course you're left on your own.

Many thanks
Deb

[JonW]

What was a rabbit doing on the bus????