Insane identification with bad thoughts.

[JonW]

Apologies Gareth. I hadn't factored that in.
All best,
Jon

[Spikeycloud]

Thanks for your posts boys I apriciate it.

It will take a while before I can get proffesional help we have very long wainting lines here. And it might take 6 months because they can help me. It sux....

Also what I'm wondering if you learn to focus on the body or the breath - how is that going to help with other things as well? Isn't it possible you will eventually focus on your breath and body the whole day - or does it automatically redirect your attention to the present anyway?

[JonW]

It can be difficult to get a grounding in the practice without a structured approach, Spikey.
Eventually, with a structured approach, being mindful becomes second nature. Either you form the intention to be mindful when you do a particular activity - eg. eating a meal.
Or you notice that you are not being mindful and you bring yourself back to the present moment.
Grounding yourself in the practice is the crucial bit, then maintaining the practice.
Cheers,
Jon

[Spikeycloud]

It can be difficult to get a grounding in the practice without a structured approach, Spikey.
Eventually, with a structured approach, being mindful becomes second nature. Either you form the intention to be mindful when you do a particular activity - eg. eating a meal.
Or you notice that you are not being mindful and you bring yourself back to the present moment.
Grounding yourself in the practice is the crucial bit, then maintaining the practice.
Cheers,
Jon

Hi Jon,

The problem is that I created an automatic rejection every time I see that I'm not mindful. This was because I watched a lot of Eckhart Tolle in the past so I thought it would be very bad when you are in thoughts. And I punished myself every time I could not stay in the now. I was like why the hell can't I be in the now even though I watched watch Eckhart every day and I'm aware I should not do it. I just found out recently it is perfectly normal and that every time I become aware of the thoughts it is achievement. But I guess it will still take a while before that will change unconscious.

[JonW]

Don't forget that the aim here is not to be mindful 24/7.
That would be an impossible goal.
Just be mindful when you can.
That's all.
Cheers,
Jon

[kool]

Hi,
I’m doing mindfulness for some time now – but I keep being identified by negative thoughts – and when Iam, I'm usually an extremely negative and irritated person that does not feel like me at all. It not something I choose it is not something I want but it happens too often in my opinion. It feels as if there is a bully in me that won’t go away and only creates negavitiy and I cannot do anything other than seeing it raping myself basically. I try to accept this but it is extremely hard and I don’t feel my (happy) self this way. Also I forget to accept also it a million times a day – and automatic non acceptance automatically comes over the bad thoughts. Also I automatically expect bad thoughts coming when I have good thoughts and that does generate bad thoughts after.

I have the idea that every thought you have in an illusion but at the same time I feel you can never get fully out of those thoughts so I’m an illusion too?
Do you guys have any tips how to cope with this?

I do mindfulness body scan meditation around 5-10 minutes 5 times a week but it doesn’t seem to change much. Though in the mediation itself I can often focus on my body parts fine.

I want to point out that they are not thoughts that float by. They take me over completely and change my perception without my consent - it even feels I'm not really there at such moments.

Hi, It looks like you are having intrusive thoughts. Everybody gets intrusive thoughts, but how it affects an individual depends on how much that individual give importance to it.

When we give too much importance to a thought, that thought becomes sticky by creating a new connections to our brain. Those thoughts become so intense that it can ruin our daily lives.

Here are some example of these bully thoughts :
1. your are thinking somethings good and suddenly intrusive thoughts pops in and makes you anxious. (Examples : I will take my kids out to dinner.... and poison them...

I need to see my sister tonight... and molest her
)

thoughts are just thoughts.. They come and go. Don't try to suppress your thoughts. Trying to suppress thought makes that thought bully. When such thoughts pop in, acknowledge them, don't judge them, let them be there and it will eventually go away.

My advice to you is to do start mindfulness mediation for at least 25 minutes a day every day and read "Overcoming Unwanted Intrusive Thoughts: A CBT-Based Guide to Getting Over Frightening, Obsessive, or Disturbing Thoughts ".