Slacker looking for a way to save time meditating

Post here if you are just starting out with your mindfulness practice. Mindfulness is a really difficult concept to get your head around at first, and it might be that you would benefit from some help from others.
JonW
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Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Mon Nov 14, 2016 9:42 pm  

'I dont really notice the benefits of meditation unless I do it for two hours a day.'

What benefits are you expecting exactly?
Cheers,
Jon
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
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Bert
Posts: 31
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jul 2016

Mon Nov 14, 2016 9:57 pm  

I tend to spend a good deal of the day regretting past mistakes, and wishing I could redo them, despite the absurdity and impossibility of the concept. The more I meditate in any given day, the less I experience this. I wish I could say I notice the effects if I meditate less than 2 hours a day. It has crossed my mind that maybr I have a subtle case of A.D.D. because of this. I realize that I would benefit from trying harder to observe and not get caught up in my thoughts during my sittings, that way I could have more "concentrated" sessions and consequently one of these 20 minute sessions would be equivalent to 2 hrs of my current sittings.

JonW
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Posts: 2897
Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Tue Nov 15, 2016 8:27 am  

Hi Bert,
Trying hard might just be the problem here. This is not about striving for anything. It's not even about getting somewhere. It's about learning to be with what is, moment to moment.
It might be an idea to look into structuring your practice more and perhaps working with a teacher.
All good things,
Jon
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
Follow this link to join the WhatsApp group and receive notifications: https://chat.whatsapp.com/K5j5deTvIHVD7z71H3RIIk

Bert
Posts: 31
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jul 2016

Tue Nov 15, 2016 12:39 pm  

When I dont keep the goals in mind, I lose the motivation to be mindful and meditate. Everything we do in life is for a purpose, so I am just fooling myself if I tell myself I am doing it for no reason. I did hire a teacher over the phone for several sessions, but it cant hurt to speak to another one. Do you have any suggestions?

JonW
Team Member
Posts: 2897
Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Tue Nov 15, 2016 8:45 pm  

Hi Bert,
One possibility right here.
All best wishes,
Jon
https://www.everyday-mindfulness.org/online-courses/
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
Follow this link to join the WhatsApp group and receive notifications: https://chat.whatsapp.com/K5j5deTvIHVD7z71H3RIIk

Bert
Posts: 31
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jul 2016

Tue Nov 15, 2016 9:47 pm  

Thanks. How many hours of phone calls/Skype does it entail?

JonW
Team Member
Posts: 2897
Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Tue Nov 15, 2016 10:29 pm  

That's negotiable, Bert.
All best, Jon
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
Follow this link to join the WhatsApp group and receive notifications: https://chat.whatsapp.com/K5j5deTvIHVD7z71H3RIIk

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Matt Y
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Posts: 219
Practice Mindfulness Since: 0- 0-1997
Location: Melbourne, Australia
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Wed Nov 16, 2016 9:41 am  

Hi Bert,

I think your 'difficulty' lies in the statement: "I realize that I would benefit from trying harder to observe and not get caught up in my thoughts during my sittings."

No amount of willpower will prevent you from getting caught up in your thoughts. Not getting caught up in thoughts is not a function of willpower. It's a function of patience and persistence, of intending not to get caught up in them, and most importantly, in being pleased when you realise you have lost focus, rather than disappointed. Each time you realise you have lost focus is actually a sign that you are developing better concentration, and to reinforce these new neural pathways you need to give yourself a mental 'pat on the back'. Job well done!

And perhaps even more importantly, it would be worth questioning the whole notion that getting away from your thoughts will be beneficial. I would suggest that establishing greater tolerance for, curiosity in, and acceptance of your thoughts will lead to a less problematic relationship with your mind. In other words, you need to make friends with your thoughts, including the one's that you'd prefer not to have. This is a much easier task than trying to keep them permanently at bay.
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Bert
Posts: 31
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jul 2016

Wed Nov 16, 2016 12:17 pm  

I appreciate the good insights. I tend to chastise myself when my mind wanders, when I should actually be congratulating myself.

When I meditate, I also tend to strive to have a blank mind for the whole period, which I know is impossible. I understand we are supposed to be aware we are thinking while we are thinking, but I cant grasp this concept. I am aware that I am going to think, and I am aware that I just thought, but I have not been able to be aware WHILE I am thinking. Maybe it is more difficult because when I think, I dont think in words, so the thoughts are harder to follow? Any suggestions would be appreciated.

JonW
Team Member
Posts: 2897
Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Wed Nov 16, 2016 12:54 pm  

'I understand we are supposed to be aware we are thinking while we are thinking, but I cant grasp this concept.'

Try looking it more like simply noticing thoughts as they arise, noticing habitual thought patterns, noticing thoughts for what they are - mental events.
It's all in the gentle noticing.
Cheers,
Jon
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
Follow this link to join the WhatsApp group and receive notifications: https://chat.whatsapp.com/K5j5deTvIHVD7z71H3RIIk

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