Why is it that people stop meditating?

Post here if you have been practising for a while, and you are starting to get your head around what this is all about. Also post here if you are a long-term practitioner with something to say about the practice.
JonW
Team Member
Posts: 2897
Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Fri Jun 03, 2016 11:21 am  

Hi Pjharii,
I'm not sure there's any great secret to it.
I find that it helps to vary my practice, mixing sitting meditations with body scans, mindful movement, walking meditations, meditating to music etc.
Like anything in life, a bit of variety is no bad thing.
Also, as Jon Kabat-Zinn is fond of saying, 'You don't have to enjoy it - just do it.'
Meditation is not about having a blissful time on the mat/bench/cushion. It's about being with what is in the present moment. Maybe try approaching it with that it mind,
Cheers,
Jon
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
Follow this link to join the WhatsApp group and receive notifications: https://chat.whatsapp.com/K5j5deTvIHVD7z71H3RIIk

Emm
Posts: 1
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Feb 2010

Sat Jul 16, 2016 10:29 am  

For me its habit energy. I also have a very clear addiction to suffering. When I have my practice, and meditate formally and regularly, everything is so much better. Likewise when I eat good nutritious food and exercise. But I still find myself slipping into my old unhappy habits at certain points. Kindness and compassion towards myself helps a lot. Being with a community that practices also helps a lot too.

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MindfulnessJar
Posts: 18
Location: UK
Contact:

Sat Jul 16, 2016 7:57 pm  

JonW wrote:Meditation is not about having a blissful time on the mat/bench/cushion. It's about being with what is in the present moment.


This is so true.

I think every meditation experience is different.

When I first tried meditating I thought I was doing it wrong and that I had to achieve a quiet mind. I didn't really get what all the fuss was about and I stopped.

A few years later I came back to it. Slowly I established a regular daily meditation practice. It changed everything for me. I found that meditating helped me to be more mindful off the mat as well as on it.

Things were going well for me and I soon became complacent. So, as I was finding it relatively easy to remember to be mindful, I decided that I could still be mindful without meditating. Gradually I let my daily practice drop away.

After only a short while without meditating, I became less and less mindful and more caught up in unnecessary thoughts and habits. Once I noticed this it became obvious to me that I needed to return to a formal daily meditation practice. No more kidding myself.

Some days my sessions are easy, some are not. It does not matter. The most important thing is to make some time to sit in silence. Everything else then falls into place.

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Happyogababe
Posts: 250
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jan 2008

Wed Jul 20, 2016 10:18 am  

MindfulnessJar wrote:
JonW wrote:Meditation is not about having a blissful time on the mat/bench/cushion. It's about being with what is in the present moment.


This is so true.

I think every meditation experience is different.

When I first tried meditating I thought I was doing it wrong and that I had to achieve a quiet mind. I didn't really get what all the fuss was about and I stopped.

A few years later I came back to it. Slowly I established a regular daily meditation practice. It changed everything for me. I found that meditating helped me to be more mindful off the mat as well as on it.

Things were going well for me and I soon became complacent. So, as I was finding it relatively easy to remember to be mindful, I decided that I could still be mindful without meditating. Gradually I let my daily practice drop away.

After only a short while without meditating, I became less and less mindful and more caught up in unnecessary thoughts and habits. Once I noticed this it became obvious to me that I needed to return to a formal daily meditation practice. No more kidding myself.

Some days my sessions are easy, some are not. It does not matter. The most important thing is to make some time to sit in silence. Everything else then falls into place.


Very well said :)
'You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf' Jon Kabat Zinn

beherenow.space
Posts: 41
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Sep 1991

Sun Jul 31, 2016 9:16 pm  

I agree; my experience has been very similar. One of the reasons I started to run small mindfulness practise sessions was to ensure I kept attending regularly!
Stephen

Karen
Posts: 11
Practice Mindfulness Since: 19 Aug 2016

Fri Sep 16, 2016 8:45 am  

Hello.
I'm new to the site. I've been reading the Mark Williams mindfullness book and I thought that mindfulness helped prevent anxiety from returning and getting out of control.,
I started my practice in Jan 2015 during a depression. I stopped medication in March this year and my anxiety came back 5 weeks ago. I've been meditating but I'm struggling so I started my medication again last night.
I suppose I want to belive I can be free of this one day.

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Gareth
Site Admin
Posts: 1465

Fri Sep 16, 2016 9:25 am  

Hi Karen,

Take a look at these two blogs:

https://www.everyday-mindfulness.org/ma ... y-anxiety/

https://www.everyday-mindfulness.org/on ... r-over-me/

They may help you.

I don't think any of us can be completely free of anxiety. Sometime's anxiety points us in the direction of something we need to take a closer look at. This is not to minimise it's debilitating effect on people sometimes.

My advice to you would be to start practising and keep practising. Maybe you could take a look at some resources that are specifically aimed at mindfulness for anxiety.

blloyd
Posts: 6
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jan 1972
Location: Byron Bay
Contact:

Tue Nov 15, 2016 12:30 am  

This group is sponsored by a site called Everyday Mindfulness. I was attracted to the group because of the name.

But I find that what is written here seems more like a Buddhist support group to support Buddhist meditation. So it might seem that I'm argumentative and negative. From where I am, I am able to make a clear distinction between Buddhist meditation and Mindfulness meditation. They are quite different in practice and intention.

I am also able to make a clear distinction between everyday Mindfulness and non-conscious living. I clearly do not need to do formal meditation to practise Mindfulness, to live consciously.

As far as I can tell, Mindfulness is not the meditation. Mindfulness is something that you would do in your everydaily life as you go about your business. Mindfulness meditation is something that you can do to practise the skills of conscious living. Clearly the practise is not the practice. To begin with one is a verb and the other is a noun. In other words, the game is the game and the practise is for you to develop the skills that you need in the game. There's always more than one way to skin a cat, if you are a cat skinner.

In my 16 years of Private Practice I well and truly gave up years ago expecting people to meditate as a means of resolving or defusing anxiety. Instead I focus on the Mindful skills of paying attention to what the mind is up to with its perceptual distortions and unrelenting expectations. My clients do seem quite interested in that approach.

JonW
Team Member
Posts: 2897
Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Tue Nov 15, 2016 8:30 am  

'This group is sponsored by a site called Everyday Mindfulness. I was attracted to the group because of the name.
But I find that what is written here seems more like a Buddhist support group to support Buddhist meditation.'

This site is not sponsored by anybody or anything. We are purely secular in our approach.
It sounds like you may have got Everyday Mindfulness mixed up with another site altogether. Our mindfulness model is Jon Kabat-Zinn who writes/teaches in a secular manner.
I hope this clarifies matters.
Best,
Jon
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
Follow this link to join the WhatsApp group and receive notifications: https://chat.whatsapp.com/K5j5deTvIHVD7z71H3RIIk

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