Thoughts just an illusion? + analytical thinking?

[piedwagtail91]

We could go 50-50

[JonW]

That's very generous of you, Mick. I have no hesitation in humbly accepting.
You're a gent.
Cheers,
Jon

[piedwagtail91]

Now we just have to work on, sorry, persuade buddhakind

[Buddhakind]

Hey guys! I actually have another question, if you don't mind:))

Regarding meditation practise (body scan, breathing, walking, etc.) I feel quite comfortable so far (not saying it's easy). But I feel that I get the hang of it.

But you've mentioned and I ve read many times now, mindfulness doesn't end at the formal practises. It is wise to also incorporate it in everyday life. And here i get stuck..

When I talk to friends, write smth, just think, walk or just sit around I constantly are worried if I'm mindful or not. "Am I supposed to be mindful now? Am I actually mindful right now? Am I doing it right? Etc."

As I tend to get obsessed about things quite quickly, I fear to get obsessed about mindfulness, if that makes sense to you guys. Am I alone here?

I once read somewhere that it is good to remind oneself to be mindful, but with me it doesn't feel like a soft reminder, but more like "must/should" thought/urge which comes constantly.

What do u think?

[JonW]

Hi Buddhakind,
The aim is not to be mindful 24/7. That would turn mindfulness into yet another form of striving and, besides, it would be impossible to sustain.
Outside of formal practice, we can deliberately be mindful when performing certain tasks or when we're in certain situations. But, as much as anything, it's about gently noticing when we're not being mindful - e.g. when we're walking down the road and we realise we've been snagged up in the thought stream. At that point we might notice our breathing, the blue of the sky, the green of the leaves etc. In other words, we catch ourselves and we become present to our experience.
In my experience, mindfulness gradually becomes a habit so I seem to catch myself not being mindful less and less.
Cheers,
Jon

[Buddhakind]

Puh!
"The aim is not to be mindful 24/7"
"..we can deliberately be mindful.."

Very common sense but still an eye-opener for me.

Very helpful. Thank you Jon!

[piedwagtail91]

In my experience, mindfulness gradually becomes a habit so I seem to catch myself not being mindful less and less.
Cheers,
Jon

that's how it works for me too.

i notice when i'm not mindful.
that doesn't mean i don't daydream or plan, i do, probably more than i should.
but i'm aware i'm daydreaming and if it starts to go 'toxic' i stop.
i suppose when i'm not being deliberately mindful of something i sometimes see mindfulness like an antivirus program running on a computer, it's not there in your face but it's there in the background , watching and caring.

[Buddhakind]

I really like the antivirus analogy!

[piedwagtail91]

it doesn't always work but then it's not a paid for one

[Matt Y]

I think there are two very important points here:

1. The aim is not to be mindful 24/7.

Yes. That would be the pursuit of perfection. Highly unrealistic, and unhelpful. The idea that we should always be some way (e.g. mindful, calm, with the breath) is strangely seductive but unhelpful. We need to be flexible and resilient, and able to meet each moment appropriately, rather than by following an 'ideal'.

2. That doesn't mean i don't daydream or plan, i do, probably more than i should.

Daydreaming and planning tend to get a bad wrap in mindfulness circles. But both are essential for a healthy mind and healthy living. (Just think of the strife you'd find yourself in if you never planned!) Of course, it is possible to do too much planning and / or daydreaming; but it's equally true that we can do too little. In other words, there's no need to demonise these habits.