Mindfulness while grieving

Post here if you have been practising for a while, and you are starting to get your head around what this is all about. Also post here if you are a long-term practitioner with something to say about the practice.
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larorra
Posts: 152

Fri Feb 20, 2015 11:15 am  

Hi everyone, I havent been on here like forever as can never get on a PC and am now using my PC in work but have to be quick, while the boss is on her break ;) ok so 2 weeks ago my wee dog died of a short illness aged 9. It was such a shock as she had been in good health previously and when blood tests were taken it seems she has picked up something while out on a walk and it affected her whole system and got into her kidneys. It was a horrible time for all the family and I have been totally heartbroken since she passed away. Every time I try to practice all I can think about is her but am practicing kindness to myself and saying its ok to grieve and the last few days have been able to stay with the breathing without actually breaking down in r=tears as all I can see is her face when I practice. At other times I keep busy and manage to get through the day. I guess the pain will lessen with time. All I can say for anyone practicing through grief to is to be kind to yourself and know its ok to grieve and the painwill lessen.
Jackie

You can find me on Twitter @larorra08

JonW
Team Member
Posts: 2897
Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Fri Feb 20, 2015 1:21 pm  

Hello larorra,
So sorry to hear about the loss of your dog.
Please remember that you'll always get a friendly welcome on this forum.
All good things,
Jon, Hove
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
Follow this link to join the WhatsApp group and receive notifications: https://chat.whatsapp.com/K5j5deTvIHVD7z71H3RIIk

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larorra
Posts: 152

Fri Feb 20, 2015 2:40 pm  

thanks Jon :)
Jackie

You can find me on Twitter @larorra08

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piedwagtail91
Posts: 613
Practice Mindfulness Since: 0- 3-2011
Location: Lancashire witch country

Fri Feb 20, 2015 6:21 pm  

Really sorry to hear about your dog. We lost ours almost 12 months ago.
It took a while to come to terms with the loss.
Eventually I felt I should try to have a happy memory of her. So I mentally took her on her favourite walk. Mentally in my head that is, I was physically doing her walk.
I visualised her usual path. When I got to the woodland it was nice and sunny so I went into the woodland as we always did. I buried her favourite tennis ball containing some of her ashes under the bush she always dropped it under.
I stayed for a while then left her there happily running around in the sun .
I found peace doing that.
Not sure if it'll help.
I did practice a lot of self compassion for a couple of months.

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Gareth
Site Admin
Posts: 1465

Mon Feb 23, 2015 10:52 am  

Hi Jacqui, lovely to hear from you again.

You've hit the nail on the head when you are telling yourself that it's OK to grieve. Your grief is real, and it's just an indication of how much you loved the dog.

Have a look at this blog, it might help you:
http://www.everyday-mindfulness.org/min ... -my-grief/

JonW
Team Member
Posts: 2897
Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Mon Feb 23, 2015 11:23 am  

That's such a beautiful post, piedwagtail91. Brought tears to my eyes.
It would make for a wonderful blog…
Cheers,
Jon, Hove
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
Follow this link to join the WhatsApp group and receive notifications: https://chat.whatsapp.com/K5j5deTvIHVD7z71H3RIIk

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piedwagtail91
Posts: 613
Practice Mindfulness Since: 0- 3-2011
Location: Lancashire witch country

Mon Feb 23, 2015 1:39 pm  

Thanks Jon.
I never expected losing a pet to hurt so much.
Feel free to use it if you like.
Mick

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FeeHutch
Posts: 1010
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Mar 2012
Location: Steel City
Contact:

Tue Feb 24, 2015 1:39 pm  

Lovely to 'see' you Jackie. I'm sorry you are dealing with such painful time. There's always a warm welcome here for you.
Thank you for sharing that Mick x
“Being mindful means that we take in the present moment as it is rather than as we would like it to be.”
Mark Williams

http://adlibbed.blogspot.co.uk/p/mindfulness-me-enjoy-silence.html
Find me on twitter - @feehutch

User avatar
larorra
Posts: 152

Fri Feb 27, 2015 1:57 pm  

thank-you all so much for your kind words. It does get easier with time and I am beginning to be able to practice without feeling nothing but sadness. Gareth I will look at that link now. thanks again. Hope you are all doing good. Have a great and mindful weekend! :)
Jackie

You can find me on Twitter @larorra08

User avatar
larorra
Posts: 152

Fri Feb 27, 2015 2:11 pm  

Gareth wrote:Hi Jacqui, lovely to hear from you again.

You've hit the nail on the head when you are telling yourself that it's OK to grieve. Your grief is real, and it's just an indication of how much you loved the dog.

Have a look at this blog, it might help you:
http://www.everyday-mindfulness.org/min ... -my-grief/

just read the blog Gareth, and it does help me. I also had a lot of thoughts going around in my head just after honey passed and very strong emotions, from pain, sadness, anger, why? what if? but I told myself its ok just watch those thoughts and I have practiced self-compassion. I'm getting there. Mindfulness has helped.
Jackie

You can find me on Twitter @larorra08

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