Everyday Mindfulness

It also continues to hurt after meditation and its worse after than before I started well kind of.

I do half of it right I have strong awareness and I half feel better after the meditation but along with the extra awareness I strain my mind extra too.

How do I not strain my mind as I meditate obviously you are not supposed to use the mind at all but I cant help but use a half way house of extra awareness but also extra mind use as well, and its producing mixed up results.

I suppose im resisting straining which is causing me to solve the problem by straining my mind? (as I focus my awareness at the same time) Its so insidious the way you trip yourself up in seemingly legit ways but they turn out to be self fulfilling rubbish

If you are experiencing pain when meditating, I would advise putting your meditation practice on hold and consulting your GP at the first available opportunity.
Jon