Could Not Find Peace in the Frantic world, Yet!

[Ibnezubair]

It is my 6th week of practice. I am following "Mindfulness-a practical guide to finding peace in a frantic world", but it seems I could not find peace yet, though I came across a clear insight: I have a long to-do list in my mind. Almost every item of this to-do list is important and I cannot drop anything from this list. On the other hand 24 hours of each day are not enough. This list demands a day of at least 28 hours. So the result is a frantic mind! Also some of the habit releasers prescribed seem to add one more item in that list, which is making life already frantic.
What do the experts suggest?
Ibnezubair

[Gareth]

I cannot drop anything from this list.

You seem to be meditating with a particular goal in mind, and this can act as a barrier in getting your practice off the ground.

So you have a busy mind. Meditate with that. All those times that it is skipping off into your to-do list are opportunities for you to notice it and come back, thereby strengthening your mindfulness muscle.

Meditation is not a means to an end. It is the end itself.

[Ibnezubair]

Really precious advice. Thank you!

Ibnezubair

[Peter]

Gareth is absolutely right.

I'd also like to state the obvious that the way you're perceiving your lists is the problem. You cannot create more time, and maybe you cannot drop things on the list. Then the only solution is to let the list grow and only do as much as is wise.

I use the methodology 'getting things done' in combination with 'Pomodoro'. Maybe you could check them out. (another thing on your list

[alexcr87]

Quick thought about to do lists (Gareth already wisely covered the meditation aspect) because I'm also the type that worries about not having enough hours in a day : I found out recently that when sitting for a long time on a to-do list, items seem to lose their attraction. I found myself crossing out a lot of things I've had for a long time on my to-do list, finding they didn't apply anymore to my situation, to my life. Also, I prioritize. I tried to make a commitment this year to prioritize the things that will have the most significance/positive effect in my life. That helped me see more clearly what's really important for me, and eased the stress of not completing everything this very week. And lastly, I also made some compromise and dedicated a bit more time to clear the things on that list each week.

Yesterday I was reading one of Donna Fahri's books (Yoga Mind, Body & Spirit: A Return to Wholeness) and she talked about the time when she moved to a house where the garden was in a very bad state. She made a commitment to return it in good shape by dividing it into 4x4 squares, and she did one square each week, not allowing herself to look at what was remaining. At the end of the year the whole garden was done. I think that's a beautiful analogy we can use in this situation : to accomplish the things you want to do, just make a commitment to doing a little of it, and the rest will follow naturally.

[JonW]

As a mindfulness teacher I not infrequently hear from course participants that they don't have the time to meditate.
There's a simple answer to that:
If you can't find the time, then make the time.
Mindfulness requires a certain commitment to regular, preferably daily, meditation. There's no getting around that.
Best wishes,
Jon

[Ibnezubair]

Thanks to all who responded.
Ibnezubair

[fabimarkl]

Hi Ibnezubair, I'd love it if we all switched to 28 hour days. When I sit still for once, I can observe my mind reminding me of the 57 things on my to do list that I didn't complete yet and then my mind adds another 32 items to that list for tomorrow. It's quite a "firework" in my head sometimes. I tried many ways to calm my mind intentionally. It never lasted longer then a few seconds.

What I realized is that nearly nothing on my to do list matters as much as my mind wants me to believe. And when a deadline comes up, the feeling of pressure (or anxiety) is not created by the deadline or the task that needs to be completed, but the pressure is made up by my mind. It wants to tell me that if I'm not under pressure, I may never get it done. Which is wrong, because the important things always get done somehow.

I do practice mindfulness meditation, but in a different way than most people. I don't make time for it in my day. I found it much, much more effective to just do what I do anyway with full attention. For example, one day I will set up reminders to be present whenever I open a door. To feel the handle of the door, listen to the sound when I push the doorknob and smell how the air is different in the room I'm walking into.

I have found 23 everyday or weekly activities that I turned into mindfulness meditation practices. They don't require me to "make time for my practice" and I found them to be much more effective than meditating alone in my room. Because, as soon as I leave the room, I'll lose that peace.

If you're interested, I can send you 23 wallpapers for your phone with the practices on it. I put them on my phone as wallpaper. And switch them out every other day as a reminder. Just let me know, and I send them to you.

All the best,
Fabian

[alexcr87]

That's interesting Fabian! Would you mind posting the wallpapers directly into the conversation so everyone can benefit?

[JonW]

Mindfulness is not about attaining a certain state - like peace, or bliss. It's about being with what is.
It's a meditation-based practice. In my view, it would be misleading to say otherwise.
I'm hearing a lot now about how to be mindful without going to the trouble of meditating. I don't buy it.
Best,
Jon