Everyday Mindfulness

Hi there,

I have been practising mindfulness for some months now and keep feeling a few questions popping up. I was wondering if someone could answer them.

1. I understand that acceptance isn't resignation. However, isn't every remark or comment you make about your experience a judgement of it? For example if someone insults you, and you feel shame, it isn't saying that 'they are wrong' a judgement?

2. This is sort of linked to the first one, but how do you analyse whether a thought, feeling or action is rational, moral, etc while being non-judgemental. Isn't thinking or analysing a thought judging?

3. I also have a question about the move from formal meditation to informal meditation.(day-to-day living)
How do you decide to do anything, at all? Obviously, formal mediation, where you decide to stop everything is a extreme but once you have finished it, how do they decide to act on the urges you get to work, talk or even think in normal everyday life? If you practising being receptive, to for example to thought even in informal practise, once you feel thoughts come and then go, that's it. You observed them and now they are gone. The next moment has come. There is no space to think, to analyse, to decide. So how you do anything? I don't wanna become a stillness zombie!

Many thanks for reading my questions and hopefully someone can answer them.

Hey...ok, here's some suggestions for you...

1. This is multi-leveled. You are correct...if you utter to yourself "you're wrong" in your own mind, you immediately create a stubborn judgement. OR, the complete opposite. If they're wrong within your perception, because naturally being respected and loved is right in your belief system, then it really doesn't matter at all...because you can then respect and love them back in return, regardless. If you do this, and identify that you 'recognise them as doing wrong to you, but what does it matter?' - is this still a judgement? What's going to happen? You will walk away with no scars, great. They will walk away being their usual selves. The point is, you don't need to worry about judging people or experiences, you just need to remain mindful of what happened.

2. Which brings me to your next question. How do you decide? You just do. The fact of the matter is, you are the gatekeeper to the truth. You and only you. You create your own world based on your own enlightenment. People argue constantly over who's right over a situation - a great thread I was observing the other day was Halal meat vs Non-Halal. Who's right in that argument, really? Your subconscience decides these things for you...but first, it must be trained. We can train and practice a way to train any moral into us...brainwashing if you will. You can't escape it, you just have to decide and live by it, and just be ready to adapt if you learn something new. At the age of 70, I'm pretty certain I'll still be making changes to my life because I'll still be making mistakes! You can still "judge" to weigh up a situation that will benefit your overall morals. They key is to not inflict your will on others and to remain open to the fact that you still could be wrong.

3. Again yes, good observation. I spent some time with some Buddhists at the center, and thought to myself, God, if I spend much more time here I'll probably have to settle and quit my business and life dreams haha. Use your meditation as a tool for what you need it for. Some of us create imbalances because we become consumed in our meditation which is unhealthy...unless you truly believe your destiny is to devote your life to it (aka becoming a monk) You can still use your clarity of mind in everyday life without becoming a floating ghost. I, for example, like to walk into the supermarket and actually hunt down everything on my list, weaving in and out of a load of dozy trolly floaters (sorry if anyone here mindlessly wanders around supermarkets...no offence, I just have to get in there and get my stuff and leave) But this is mindfulness...you don't have to lose any part of you. You can just use it to sharpen your tools. Remember, whether we like it or not, there is a whole world of convention out there...and what we train in meditation is concentration. So simply just take the concentration element with you in your day to day activities.