Dreading Meditation

[Elena]

Jon thank you for your insights. It would be interesting to read about it.

I did the MBCT course and the 30min bodyscan was the first meditation they taught us.

[kathyjoyce]

I find the best thing when meditating is not to force anything. If you get distracted by unwanted thoughts and worries, just allow them to enter your mind and stay for as long as they want. observe these thoughts as an onlooker and you may find that they start to go. It's very hard to switch off so don't be hard on yourself. I don't know anything about the course or body scanning, but assume it's being aware of every part of your body in turn as you meditate.

[quirky_friend]

I'm grateful for the body scan. I picked up the book on mindfulness and depression just at the start of my acute bout 8 weeks ago. The body scan gave me something to anchor to during the worst part of the anxiety. I'm now slowly introducing other exercises with the goal of 30-45 min on most days.
I'm on a course on 20th for 5 weeks. It will be interesting to do some directed rather than self-directed learning.
Mark Williams repeatedly says this time to meditate is a commitment to wellbeing. I'm figuring that its an investment, and like many specialist skills we need to practice to achieve a level of ability.

[Mishmash]

Hi there,

Most people I know who meditate have been through this. It took me years to get into daily mindfulness practice. What you are doing is great also. It is better to do it every now and again than not at all. When I did MBSR course last year.....I found it really hard. Especially body scan. Just acknowledge and accept how you are feeling..then move on. If you miss a day, don't beat yourself up. By doing different practices as often as you can gets you into a routine. All the best!

[barbs55]

I posted a link to this discussion on our Facebook page and this comment was added from Breathworks-Mindfulness who have a lot of experience in this area.

"Please share this link & watch this film (available free for 7 days) it talks about this resistance to practising, amongst many other mindfulness related topics & is very encouraging to all of us developing our daily mindfulness practice." https://www.theconnection.tv/store/

[adante]

I'm a newcomer to who basically came here to ask about my experiences, which are quite similar to those of the OP. It is nice to reaffirm that I'm not alone.

I started the 8-week Palouse Mindfulness course (palousemindfulness.com) nearly 3 weeks ago (it was recommended as the meditation equivalent of the 'couch to 5k'). I remain in week 1. This week calls for a daily 20-30 minute audio-guided body scan. I've attempted it maybe 15 times and the while the first 10-15 minutes are reasonably pleasant, it has invariably ended with some combination of falling asleep, restless leg, boredom and/or impatience.

The restless leg in particular was impressive. Prior to this I have experienced it maybe 4-5 times in my entire life. With the body scan I can now semi-consistently summon it at will and often with a greater intensity than before (i.e. not just limited to legs). It is not what I had in mind with regards to experiencing heightened sensations. In fact, by incorporating the body-scan into my daily routine, restless leg becomes the most unpleasant physical sensations in my day to day life (just to give some perspective, as a runner my average day also currently involves running 10km).

So my question is, how should I consider progressing from here? Originally I didn't attempt to progress to the next week in the course because I didn't feel like I had a sufficient grasp on the body scan to continue. I've considered progressing anyway but week 2 is 50% body scan exercises as well, which is a bit of a rolleyes moment because at this point I am pretty fed up with the body scan. Is there an alternate path/course to consider?

[JonW]

Hi adante,
Welcome to the forum.
Apologies for the technical problems we're experiencing right now on the forum. I'm told those will soon be sorted, hopefully.
Normally I'd suggest remaining with a practice and meeting your resistance but it sounds like you've given the body scan a good go. My advice would be to lay the scan to one side for now and move on with the rest of the course. Maybe return to the body scan later in the course.
If you have any more questions, feel free to fire away.
All best wishes,
Jon, Hove

[MiM]

Hi adante,

I have also experienced restless legs during the body scan. At least for me it makes it absolutely impossible to continue with the meditation. However that was only in the beginning, has not happened for quite a while now. If you still want to attempt the body scan, you can try another position, sitting in a comfy chair or even standing or slowly walking. Falling asleep is very common during body scans, especially for beginners. I did a short introductory course, and more than half of us where loudly snoring. No need to regard that as a failure, Just continue.

I also started with the Palouse online course, and liked it a lot. I do recommend all the extra materials.

[adante]

Hi JonW and MiM.

Thanks for your advice. Especially given how churlish I realise I sounded. To be honest I did not realise how frustrated I was with the process until I started typing out a response, so in and of itself that was a bit therapeutic.

As you suggested I progressed onto the second week. The sitting meditation has been quite interesting. In particular one piece of advice I heard in the audio guide - to congratulate yourself when you recognise your attention slipping, instead of beating yourself up about it - has been a real development in my way of thinking.

I have to admit 30 minutes is still quite an ask. I still look forward to the end of the session and have taken to counting my breaths and stealing the occassional glance at my watch. Is doing this a big issue?

[JonW]

"I have to admit 30 minutes is still quite an ask. I still look forward to the end of the session and have taken to counting my breaths and stealing the occassional glance at my watch. Is doing this a big issue?"

I'd say it's a pretty common reaction, especially in the early stages of meditation. Try using the urge to look at your watch as part of your meditation. Notice the thought, "I'm going to look at my watch", notice any physical responses to that thought, meditate on the resistance you are feeling to continuing your meditation. Notice what it feels like to resist the urge to look at your watch.
I have days when I'm relieved that the half hour is up. Then I have days when I wish I could continue for another half hour. But what I feel about a particular meditation isn't that important. The important thing is just to continue my practice as the long-term benefits are massive.
All good things,
Jon