Hello, I am new here and new to mindfulness

[GirlcalledGed]

Hi everyone. I have been meditating for a few months now on my own. I would love to have some company, either virtual or in the real world. Has this deepened other's experience and practice of mindfulness?

[Gareth]

You've come to the right place.

Welcome.

Are you looking for a meditation buddy or just somewhere to talk about your practice?

[GirlcalledGed]

Hiya
A meditation buddy would be great, even virtual. But having somewhere to talk about mindfulness and get advice is also useful.
It does feel like I have finally come back to what I have always known. That I have been analysing and desperately trying to think my way through my problems and getting so depressed and frustrated with myself. It seems ironic and beautiful that the resolution is to not think, not search for an answer, to accept.

It seemed deeper at first however, in my first few weeks of practice I would struggle with meditation but also have profound experiences. Now it all seems a bit muddled. There's a lot of chatter in my head when I meditate but it is physically more comfortable. I am not sure if I need to 'take it further' somehow. I am doing another therapy too at the moment however, EMDR, so I also think I have to be patient and give that the attention it requires.

So I know it's right for me. I know I love it but I am scared that I will give up on it. Especially as there's only me in my world who does it. My partner accepts it but he would never partake in a million years.

Thanks for the opportunity to express myself
Xx

[JonW]

"It does feel like I have finally come back to what I have always known. That I have been analysing and desperately trying to think my way through my problems and getting so depressed and frustrated with myself. It seems ironic and beautiful that the resolution is to not think, not search for an answer, to accept."
That's brilliantly put, describes my experience too.
Welcome to the forum. You'll find us a friendly bunch, I hope.
All best,
Jon, Hove

[Gareth]

Life is certainly a lot more peaceful when you are not thinking, but whatever you do, don't make 'not thinking' a goal to aim for, because whatever we do, we are always going to have thoughts.

Mindfulness has certainly led to me having a quieter mind generally, but even now, there are days when the mind is going at a million miles an hour, constantly thinking. I'm just much better at letting go of the thinking these days that's all.

[JonW]

Hi Ged,
One option might be to look out for a mindfulness meet-up group in your area. If there isn't one, maybe start your own...
I set up a group here in Brighton 15 months ago and it's grown to 125 members. We meet every six weeks in my local pub. Average attendance is 10. It's a great way to connect with like-minded souls. Very easy to set up and cheap (less than a tenner a month) to run.
More details here:
https://secure.meetup.com/create/
All best,
Jon

[GirlcalledGed]

Thank you for your kind thoughts and advice. I could not imagine setting a group up, but maybe one day. I try to dip underneath my thoughts to the stillness and clarity underneath but it seems a battle at the moment which i think requires acceptance but is hard to do.
I don't really understand my resistance. Is it just habit? Addiction? Neurons firing one way until I finally send them another?
I have a 2 year old son. He is incredible and the greatest teacher of mindfulness and it is my honour and deepest desire to teach him and lead by example
But I know that at this moment I am leading a bad example. I have to accept that fact to accept my dislike of that fact and desire to be better to be a better example...does that make any sense or am I talking riddles??!

Thanks in advance
Xx