CJ's story

Please post your mindfulness stories here and your story might also feature on our blog (with your permission). You can also introduce yourself here. We want to create a library of mindful journeys and experiences.
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BronteFan
Posts: 112
Practice Mindfulness Since: 11 Dec 2018
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Thu May 30, 2019 7:42 pm  

JonW wrote:Ann (BronteFan) raises some excellent points about how to fold mindfulness into our everyday lives.
And it is sometimes useful to remind ourselves what mindfulness is really about.
Teacher/writer Christina Feldman defines mindfulness as, ‘the willingness and capacity to be equally present with all events and experiences with discernment, curiosity and kindness.’
Simply put, mindfulness is about awareness. The capacity to be with your experience, non-judgmentally, as it unfolds.
Mindfulness enables us to be present in our own lives. It offers a healthy alternative to living our lives ‘inside our heads’, forever at the mercy of our thoughts.
When we are being mindful, we are paying attention in the present moment to things as they are rather than losing ourselves in thoughts about how we would prefer things to be.
By consciously directing our attention to our present moment experience, we become grounded. If we are aware in the moment, we are able to choose how to respond adroitly to our situation rather than react unconsciously.
Thus, decisions are more likely to be made from a place of relative calm than from a state of deep worry or blind panic.
As we develop a more open, more intimate way of relating to body sensations, thoughts and feelings, we wake up to our experience rather than sleepwalking our way through our lives. We begin living without the weight of anxiety, depression, self-doubt, self-criticism, low self-esteem and social awkwardness.
We stop feeling overwhelmed by thoughts, feelings and body sensations. We can begin living with some peace of mind, comfortable in our own bodies, no longer feeling separate and isolated in the world. Whatever is happening in our lives at any moment, we can approach our situation with equanimity and serenity.
Jon


Thank you very much. I'm very sorry for the late response. I felt that I owed you a response a bit since but I've been avoiding this thread not because I'm ignoring Craig because I'm not but because I can relate with what he's going through as I went through something similar & I feel for Craig & understand what he must feel like because what he's going through is horrible & I'd have gushed if I said something earlier. I felt like that too. I went from loving my job to feeling like every work-day was a battle too. In my case it was caused by bullying & harassment in the work-place.

I'm very sorry to Craig for telling a bit of my story especially when I know he's going through a lot & doesn't really need it & I really want to help him.

I agree with everything you have to say & would like to thank you very much for the extra information.
Last edited by BronteFan on Thu May 30, 2019 10:19 pm, edited 4 times in total.
Let your creativity run free.
You can be who you want to be.
You can do what you want to do.
The only 1 you have to please is you.

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BronteFan
Posts: 112
Practice Mindfulness Since: 11 Dec 2018
Contact:

Thu May 30, 2019 7:52 pm  

JonW wrote:'Enrol on a course, or follow one in a book.'

This is excellent advice.
Without some kind of structured approach, it can be very difficult to maintain a mindfulness practice.
Also, it's not particularly helpful to rate your progress (or lack of it) day by day. This is not about making your mind less chattery with each passing day. It doesn't work like that. It's not like following a strict diet and ensuring that you lose a pound of weight every day. That kind of controlled vigilance only leads to more anxiety and self-criticism. This is about the long game - gradually making mindfulness a way of being. And you can't be mindful tomorrow. You can only be mindful RIGHT NOW. We are waking a path that is no other than RIGHT HERE. We're not trying to get anywhere. We're being with whatever is arising in this moment, and this moment, and this moment.
Cheers,
Jon

I agree.

I prefer just reading the books & trying out their suggestions when I come across them & carrying on with them as well as carrying on with what I learnt on the mindfulness course I went on. I followed the little mindfulness workbook though. Full catastrophe living was recommended to me but I got to the part where yoga was mentioned & stopped as I can't balance or do headstands. I found "Everyday mindfulness" books helpful though as I'm used to doing my own planning & following through with what I read.
Let your creativity run free.
You can be who you want to be.
You can do what you want to do.
The only 1 you have to please is you.

CraigJ123
Posts: 74
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jan 2017

Fri May 31, 2019 12:04 pm  

Just had a group minfulness session at work which was super relaxing although I do need to keep reminding myself what mindfullness is!

The office is much less stressful after one or two calm discussions!

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BronteFan
Posts: 112
Practice Mindfulness Since: 11 Dec 2018
Contact:

Fri May 31, 2019 12:13 pm  

CraigJ123 wrote:Just had a group minfulness session at work which was super relaxing although I do need to keep reminding myself what mindfullness is!

The office is much less stressful after one or two calm discussions!

I'm glad you had a nice relaxing time & that your work-place isn't as stressful as you've discussed things calmly.
Let your creativity run free.
You can be who you want to be.
You can do what you want to do.
The only 1 you have to please is you.

JonW
Team Member
Posts: 2897
Practice Mindfulness Since: 08 Dec 2012
Location: In a field, somewhere

Sat Jun 01, 2019 9:20 am  

'...although I do need to keep reminding myself what mindfulness is!'

The great thing is that nothing could be simpler.
Regarding 'being in the moment' though, a common 'error' is to think that we can come into the moment, through awareness, and expect it to be a certain way - calm, undisturbed, blissful...
That's not it at all. It's about meeting the moment just as it is, whether the waters are calm, choppy, or something in between.
Again, this is not about manipulating experience so we can feel a certain way or achieve a certain state.
Just being with what is. That's all.
Cheers,
Jon
Jon leads the Everyday Mindfulness group meditation on Zoom every Monday/Friday, 6pm London-time. FREE.
Follow this link to join the WhatsApp group and receive notifications: https://chat.whatsapp.com/K5j5deTvIHVD7z71H3RIIk

CraigJ123
Posts: 74
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jan 2017

Fri Jun 07, 2019 8:43 am  

Weighed myself the other day and was at 15 stone exactly which is what I've been on for the last 10 years!

I've started to do a 'to do' list as I spend a lot of time trying to remember what I need to do.

Haven't done any meditation for a while and have been making sleep a high priority. Going to try fit some in within the next few days if poss.

Mindfulness improving slightly.

CraigJ123
Posts: 74
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jan 2017

Mon Jun 10, 2019 2:06 pm  

Back on the coffee after a few months off. Found myself wide awake last night so did some minfullness stomach tensing but wasn't long before nodding off!

CraigJ123
Posts: 74
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jan 2017

Thu Jun 27, 2019 8:57 am  

I went on the scales and it showed I'd put on 2 pounds. Bit gutted. Been a bit stressed last few days so this may have been a factor. Going to try and focus on mindfulness exercising over the next few days.

CraigJ123
Posts: 74
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jan 2017

Fri Jun 28, 2019 2:11 pm  

Went on scales this morning at it stated I lost 4 pounds. This is when I get complacent!

Missed my monthly mindfulness session today due to being extra busy at work so bit gutted.

Last few nights I've been doing minfulness in bed at night. End up asleep in mins as usual! I've been waking up a few mins before alarm clock so have managed to fit in a few extra mins also.

CraigJ123
Posts: 74
Practice Mindfulness Since: 01 Jan 2017

Thu Sep 05, 2019 5:16 pm  

Not far off the 14stone mark. Trying to focus on mindfulness drinking water as well as where I put my keys, wallet and phone. :lol:

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